Kapitel 1: Trinity

"I'm sorry, Trin. I'm really am. I'm really sorry."

It took a lot of my willpower not to twitch at Silvia's every word. Especially the sound of my name from her clear, crisp voice.

My eyelids dropped. Nobody called me that except Rhazien. It was his pet name for me, and he snarled at anyone who called me by that name. It was exclusive for him.

Until Silvia appeared that is . . .

Looking at her, the very sight of her made my mouth go sour. Her hair tumbled in waves, red as autumn like sunset was glowing in her hair. Her brows curved, leading to a bold forehead which made her small pouty cherry lips stand out. Her face was made up but not overly done, just enough to highlight her beauty.

Her sun-kissed shoulders were exposed beneath her silken dress, and her eyes glowed like fire, burning and fierce. But also liquid and innocent.

She was beautiful, alright. But it shouldn't be enough to make her stay in Rhazien's palace as his concubine, especially when he promised me that I would be his one and only Queen.

Thorn of anger poked the back of my eyes, remembering the pressure from the council and the plea of his people made him bend his resolution.

But I know it wasn't the only reason . . .

Rubbing my empty stomach, my eyes closed for a brief moment. The reason why I couldn't get pregnant after all the fucking we were doing . . . it was because I was never his mate.

Taking deep, calming breaths, I faced Silvia. She was genuinely sorry, and her eagerness and bright countenance were a refreshing sight in the dull, gloomy palace. She wore her emotions on her face, and she possessed an uncanny ability to shine. Maybe that was the reason why she stole the hearts of many, even if she had just arrived two months ago.

Even the vampires treated her as their own though she was a mere mortal. While I still had to walk on silver daggers around them. Even after Rhazien changed me and all the things I had accomplished, their respect for me was only surface deep. Their attitude towards me was more because they respected and obeyed Rhazien than something born out of their hearts.

'Is it because I am not Rhazien's mate?' I smiled bitterly at myself.

"I'm so sorry, Trin." Silvia's hands clamped tightly over her quivering mouth.

I didn't know what she was sorry about. Was it because she lacked the grace and etiquette when conducting herself even after a month of practice? Or was it because I was doing all her job while she enjoyed her desserts, her frequent strolls in towns in disguised of getting to know the Kingdom, and the many pieces of jewelry and dresses she bought along the way?

But this was not the time to shove those accusations down her throat. I could do nothing as the vampires rallied behind her back just because she was Rhazien's mate. Rhazien was the same. He couldn't do anything as well . . .

Or I hope he was still the same . . .

"I really didn't know that you're Rhazien's wife."

My insides swirled like the strongest tempest. What did she mean that she didn't know? Then what did she look like when she was together with Rhazien? His sister?

But the sound of Rhazien's name on her lips made me want to rip her head and drink every last bit of her blood.

I sighed under my breath and forced my rage to simmer down. "You don't have to be sorry. You're simply . . . ," ignorant, "trying to survive."

I faked a smile. Speaking to her felt like my tongue was rubbing salt. "Isn't that why you accepted to be his Highness's concubine?"

Silvia ran her teeth over her bottom lip. "Y-yes. I was overwhelmed when I was suddenly transported here."

Her face then melted, which I could only hope was not infatuation. "It was a good thing that Rhazien found me or else . . . I could have died."

'Of course, he'd find you!' I wanted to scream and scratched the edge of my pen on her face. 'You appeared in the throne room!'

Silvia waved her arms in exaggeration. "It's not like I can go back home. I have no other choice but to be Rhazien's concubine, or else they'd kill me!"

"Highness."

Silvia blinked, and her round eyes stared at me.

"His Highness." I hate her eyes. Why must her eyes be the same color as Rhazien? Even though she wasn't a vampire. "As you are merely his Highness's concubine, then you would address him as such."

Not even I could call Rhazien by his name when we're together with his people, much less a concubine like her. "His Highness is the King of this country, and you will address him with respect."

"Eh . . ." Silvia took a step back, eyes darting between the floor and me.

"But Rhazien said it's okay," she muttered under her breath, and my eyes burned crimson.

Silvia took another step when I stood in my seat. There was so much I could tolerate, but a woman moaning Rhazien's name was not part of it.

Silvia laughed awkwardly. "A-anyway. I don't really want to be a concubine. If I knew that Rhaz––his Highness already had a wife, I never would have accepted the offer."

I took in a deep breath, and the cold feeling in my eyes returned. My shout vanished from the helplessness I felt. I couldn't hurt her, even if that were all I could think about. "It's already decided, and you're already his Highness's concubine, so there's no undoing it."

Silvia sighed and fanned herself with her hands. "Right? I mean, what is so good about a concubine anyways? Being stuck in the palace learning this and that? I just want to go home."

The pen in my hand snapped. 'Then strip naked and gag all the deserts you ate and go live in the streets! If you don't want the responsibility that came with that position, then let me just end you right here!'

"Trin?"

I gasped and the blazing furry I felt dispersed at the sound of my name from Rhazien's lips. His voice was so sensual that it sent even the straightest of men flushing the shades of red.

"Is something the matter?" Rhazien asked when he slipped from the door of my study. The heavy smoldering aura emanating from his figure oppressed all around him, but everyone would still stop and look at his presence which commanded respect and attention. He made it impossible not to stare.

Rhazien diz Razim. The 4rth monarch of the Razim Kingdom. I remembered the first time we've met surrounded by snow and blood. Even as a child, everyone would fall on their knees in wonderment of his beauty.

One look and all would swoon at the sight of him, friends and foes alike. His hair was midnight black, emphasizing his ruby eyes encaged in crystal orbs, framed by sharp, slanted brows. I swam in those eyes and forgot how many times I drowned.

His built told of lean muscles beneath his winter garbs, and his short sharp lips were very attractive and the second most viewed after his eyes. They were pressed together in a serious expression on top of a face that was so pale, almost white like mine.

He radiated with nothing but grace, and he was mesmerizing in every way.

And this man was all mine . . . or at least he was.

I felt the back of my eyes heated. "Rhaz–"

"Rhazien!"

The sound of my voice faded with Silvia's high pitch tone as she went to Rhazien's side and complained.

"Actually, I was just apologizing to Trin for being ignorant. I honestly didn't know that she's your wife and . . . and . . ."

Silvia's voice faded in my mind as I looked at Rhazien's face. I expected him to be annoyed since he didn't like women calling his name with their voices rattling his ears.

But the soft smile on his lips made me look away.

Rhazien's eyes drifted on me for a moment before he looked on the other side. It must have been hard to fight the mate's bond when your mate was practically standing in front of you. Much less pretend that you didn't like her.

"Anyway. Don't bother Trinity when she's working. If you have nothing more to say, then leave."

Silvia pouted and stomped her foot as she walked out of my study. Her discontented voice resounded in the corridor even after she left.

"Are you okay?" Rhazien asked when we were finally alone.

This would be the time that he would embrace me in his strong arms and kiss me in abandon and whisper how he misses me so, and tickle my ears with sweet nothings.

I flashed a smile that didn't reach my eyes. We hadn't had much sex ever since Silvia showed up, and the last time I remembered was him taking me from behind like he didn't want to see my face. My name was becoming a stranger on his lips, and I didn't want to imagine what he was thinking at that time.

Rhazien held my hand, and that even took effort on his part even though he didn't show it on his ice-cold face.

"Everything is going to be okay, Trin."

Would it? I willed my bottom lip not to tremble as the ache of tears threatened to escape.

I nodded and smiled.

"I promise. I won't ever betray you."

Yes . . .

Your promises were what kept me alive, even if I was slowly dying inside.

Your promises were all I had under constant fear and constant stress.

But on one cold night when the two moons united, bathing everything with its crimson glow, I found you and Silvia in your room.

RuUmBLe!

Like the weather felt my anger, the lightning splashed across the window and gave light to your naked forms. Clasping her so close to you without the tiniest gap, you held her from behind as you rocked her body to climax.

Your fangs buried deep in her neck and you . . . my beloved . . . completed the mating bond you so desperately denied.

"T-Trin . . ." Rhazien curled his lips in an attempt to hide what he had done, but the subtle baring of his teeth said that he was displeased at my sudden arrival that ruined his pleasure.

"I-I'm sorry, Trin . . ." Silvia clutched her neck, eyes melting in tears but face flushed with lust. "I . . . I fell in love with Rhaz . . ."

. . . Ahh . . . of course you did . . .

There was ringing in my ears and not because of the thunder and rain as I raced into my room and searched the item under my bed that would end my miserable fate.

The betrayal was strangling me, and it was a struggle to keep breathing!

"Trin!"

Rhazien caught up with a huff. Naked and beautifully bare. I knew he held his breath, for I heard it ceased. And I waited . . . and waited . . . waited for something . . . anything that would rekindle my dying hope.

I expected promises. False I love you's. Or even anger from ruining his pleasure . . . But he only stood there with crimson tear-rimmed restless eyes and face full of hopeless grief.

A small crystal bead trailed down to his cheek, to his neck, to the bare of his chest. "I . . . ," he croaked, and my heart stopped. "I'm sorry . . ."

My tears burst forth like a dam, spilling down my face. My chin trembled, and I looked at the gushing rain and thunder as if it would soothe my aching heart.

Rhazien clutched his hair, and his tears fell. The hard lines of his face buckled, and his tears rolled, washing a path to his chin. He was so weak, but I only felt numb.

"I couldn't fight it. In the end I . . . I fell in love with her."

With each of his whimpered words, a piece of my heart broke. His words. His promises. His caresses and kisses. Everything that made me strong just collapsed, and my world became a blur of colors that melted into gray.

"It should have been kinder . . . ," I forced a smile amidst the pain, ". . . if you had just driven a stake into my heart."

With a thrust of the silver dagger into my dead heart, I heard him scream my name.

"Trinity!"

It reminded me of the old days when we were just starting and getting to know each other.

As my vision blurred, I was reminded of his gentle caresses and kisses as he held me in his arms.

And as I turned to dust . . . I only have one thought in my mind . . .

. . . Never to fall in love with you again . . .

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A/N

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