Being the youngest sibling would always feel like it's a challenge when you grew up with two older siblings, who appeared to be way more different from you. By including an odd and introverted little sister who rarely says a word to anyone who tries to approach her. I'm that little sister.
As for my older siblings, it's quite the opposite. Everyone around them loved and adored them so much more than who would try to do that same love and adoration towards me. Yet, I didn't want that attention from others who were just showing their kindness towards me, but I felt uneasy with the pressure.
I understand these people who love me just letting me know that they would always be there if I needed help with anything that was making me unsure. But, those same people would say that I was difficult to be around because I wasn't like my siblings.
Somehow, those same people who appeared to be family members act so much differently towards my parents and my siblings. But, I was the problem.
If only some members of the family could understand the situation and take their time, I'll be around at my own pace. But, it seems to me they don't fully understand that.
How troublesome.
As for my siblings, Darwin and Eleanor, the twins who were the firstborn from my parents, they were excited to have a little sibling right before I was born. They were expecting me at the moment I was born. They had this theory of them protecting me from boys who tried to bully me, and me crying in their arms when I was upset with something, but that theory has never come true for my parents and my siblings.
They knew that I was different from the start. The first thing the twins noticed was that I'd never shown any affection towards my emotions. The thing my parents had thought was that I was sick, so they had bought me to see a doctor to let them check me out.
But nothing was wrong with me in the first place because I was healthy and showed no sickness, so the doctors told my parents not to worry about me. For them, they didn't take well.
So, they and the twins did everything they could to make me open up to me, but I wasn't having any of it. My parents had put me in therapy, and seeing that didn't go well with them and me.
So, I put my emotions for myself to not let anyone know how I felt inside. When people say to be like my siblings, they're trying to make me feel fake to let me be who they want me to be.
But, I won't let them do that by trying to make me be like my siblings. Because I love myself.
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