Kapitel 4: Strugling with Trauma

Abriella looked out the window of her large apartment, at the lights of the cars passing by below. "Just a dream…" Abriella muttered to herself. Silence... Abriella chose to remain silent and lost in her thoughts, which is now figuring out why the dream she had just now really felt like a reality. Which finally made Abriella decide to stay awake and not sleep for a while.

"What does this dream mean? Who is it?" Abriella muttered back, asking herself who didn't get the answer. Abriella drank her water again and put it in the sink. The woman walked over to her three friends who were already very asleep. Abriella covered her friends before she finally walked towards the room to rest herself.

Days after that night, Abriella kept dreaming of the murder that someone had done to her. And that made Abriella depressed, she was afraid that the dream was a sign that she would die soon. Abriella even went to the doctor to consult her anxiety which finally made the doctor give a prescription so that she could sleep well. But the effect of the drug did not last long because Abriella had the dream again. The only people who know Abriella's current condition are Natasha, and of course the boss of her company who gives her a week off for the next week to rest. How good the boss is.

Natasha was the one who visited her the most after coming home from work for the past two days, and often kept her company until she fell asleep. But when Abriella woke up from her nightmare, Natasha was not in her apartment.

This of course depressed Abriella mentally and made her feel depressed because she was constantly haunted by a terrible nightmare. She even tried not to sleep tonight, determined that she would beat the dream and not go to sleep. But the drowsiness was stronger than Abriella expected, she subconsciously closed her eyes and went to a different dreamland than before.

Abriella, who is now standing on a rooftop, saw someone with his back to her, which she recognized very well from the color of the suit the man was wearing. Abriella knew this was a dream where when she was killed by someone, the person in front of her right now. Abriella stepped up to see who had pushed her, but she could no longer move when she saw someone now standing in front of the perpetrator.

Another man was turning his back on the person so Abriella realized that the person being pushed by the man in front of her was not her, but the man in the sky blue shirt.

"Will we meet again, after you're gone?" The wind was blowing hard when the man wearing the suit asked the man wearing the sky blue shirt which was successful, Abriella was surprised to hear that.

"Huh? What are you…" Abriella's surprise didn't stop there when she saw the man wearing a sky blue shirt was David Wagner.

The incident happened so quickly that Abriella covered her mouth with both hands because she couldn't believe what she had just seen. The wind was blowing hard when she heard the sound of objects falling and screams from below that sounded clear in his ears.

"Goodbye David!" Those words were the last words she heard before finally Abriella's eyes opened again and realized that she was now lying on the bed in her room.

Abriella felt tears still flowing from her eyes, she cried when she saw the incident. Or rather dreaming of the incident. Her body for a moment she could not move because she was weak, she could only see the sunlight that had entered her room through the curtains covering her bedroom window.

Abriella's breathing was fast and slowly becoming steady after she repeatedly tried to calm down. Suddenly an incoming call made her cellphone ring, the woman was desperately trying to reach her cellphone which she placed on the nightstand beside her bed. She saw an incoming call from his boss who had not contacted her for three days. Abriella immediately answered the call even though she was still crying because of the dream earlier.

'Hello?' Abriella could hear the boss' voice and answer.

"Good morning sir, is there anything I can do?" Abriella asked in a hoarse voice, making the boss pause for a moment before finally speaking again.

"Ah, Abriella… I'll find a temporary secretary to replace you. I hope you recover soon and get back to work. Call me when you're feeling better. Okay... Have a lot of rest, see you later!" And the connection was disconnected unilaterally. Abriella sighed and lay back down on the bed tired.

She knew this would happen, even though the boss was a very nice person and would wait for Abriella to recover. But Abriella felt bad for the boss and intended to just resign. The call wasn't a reprimand or news of dismissal, but the boss said that all of Abriella's work had been handled by someone else, so she didn't have to think anything about work and focused on her mental recovery.

Abriella stared at the ceiling for a long time, "David..." She mumbled softly saying the name of the man in her dream who seemed very real to her.

Abriella got out of bed and walked towards the living room to turn on the television with shaking hands. The doctor advised her not to watch television first. But Abriella was curious so she changed the TV channel to a news channel that reported on the development of David's suicide case. The longer she heard about the news, the more Abriella felt her heart race. She immediately felt scared, she was afraid of the man in the suit she saw pushing David who he didn't know who it was. Abriella quickly turned off the television and threw herself onto the sofa. The woman tried to steady her breathing.

"Will I be strong with this?" The woman muttered to herself after a long silence staring at the ceiling of her apartment.

When the thinking Abriella felt sleepy and was about to close her eyes again, Abriella quickly got up from her position and chose to do all the housework. Including replacing window curtains.

'I have to keep myself busy so I can forget this!' She thought with full determination. Until finally time just passed, making Abriella unable to feel it and exhausted from doing almost all the housework that she used to do little by little.

Abriella plopped down on the sofa in the living room of her apartment and exhaled tiredly. In front of her a glass of mocktail that she had made earlier, the woman turned on the air conditioner. Unknowingly, Abriella took the television remote and turned on the thin cube that could show the picture.

'Come back with us on the show...'

Abriella who was watching a variety of programs on television, the tiredness she felt in her body made her slowly close her eyes and fall asleep along with the voice of the emcee fading in her ears.

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