Kapitel 247: Chapter 247 - Interlude: Jack's Upbringing 1
<Day 1>
Taling into this thing feels weird, but the headmaster insisted on it. An audio journal, is what he called it? I don't really see the point in making me do this. But the headmaster said I should try it out. So, here's me, trying to put into words what happened these past few days.
Two mornings ago, I was fine. It started out as a day like any other. I woke up in the same bed, in the same house, nothing out of the ordinary.
I spent the entire day doing what I would do almost every day — running around, playing. My parents could never really afford me to go to school. But I guess that was fine with me.
Later that night, I walked back home. Alone. My friends don't really have the same living situation as I did. I walked along the empty street, planning what I would do when I got home.
When I reached the front door, I couldn't help but think that something felt off. The light shining on the doorstep was dim. Heh. Despite our money problems, my dad made it abundantly clear that the light should always be on when it's dark out.
I called out to my dad as soon as I opened the door. He would usually be drunk right about that time. In fact, there were often times where he didn't even notice me — just the bottle in his hands. But that night, well, just wasn't one of those nights.
I couldn't believe what I saw. There was blood everywhere. Even if the light wasn't all that bright, the stench of the blood just gave it away. And, in my house, was my dad sprawled on the floor and bloodied to a pulp. I didn't understand what had happened. But, looking back at it now, when I saw my dad dead in our rundown home, I felt — no, feel happy.
Heh.
Of course, I wasn't going to mention this to anyone. But I stood there for a good while. Standing over my deadbeat of a father's corpse, a part of me felt liberated. No wonder mom left.
Don't get me wrong. I don't really feel much resentment towards my dad. Even if he gambled all the money, even if he loved that bottle more than me, I don't really hate him for it. No, I feel nothing for him. It took his death for me to realize that.
But, apparently, I'm the only one who sees it that way.
'Poor thing.' The number of times I've heard those two words these past few days was unbelievable. I don't really mind it, of course. It just means that they cared, right? There's nothing wrong with that. At least, it was still better than what my dad would've done.
Speaking of, the cops found my dad's dead body the next day. Although, they showed up late at night, and I was a block away at the time. The cops then picked me up and drove me to the station.
Once we got there, the officers told me to sit by and wait. They didn't seem to have any questions for me, but I overheard them talking. I think they said that my dad had owed someone some money. But they refused to say anything else when I was in the room.
Throughout all of this, I kept quiet. I didn't say a word to anyone about anything. But then again, the cops didn't ask me anything. I'm still a kid, after all.
I stayed put in the cold, plastic chair of the waiting room in the police station. At the time, I didn't know what was in it for me. I was alone. Well, I always am, if you really think about it. But, this time, it was official. My dad was dead. I have no family left, no place to call home.
But, I feel calm.
I didn't even feel nervous when I overheard the officers talking. I'm not afraid of what's going to happen. A part of me was even looking forward to it. Because I knew. I knew that whatever I would have to deal with from here on out would be a lot better than my crappy life.
But then, they brought me here.
Apparently, this was the place where most kids end up. These kids have their own sob stories. It was fair, considering this place is an orphanage. There were more kids like me out here than I realized. But, none of them felt the same way I did. This place is depressing as all hell.
Now, I don't know why the headmaster gave me this thing. He said that it would help put a lot of things into perspective. Although, I'm not really sure what that means.
...
Huh.
Now that I think about it, he did say some other things. Like how I'll be okay and take my time to grieve? That was after I told him I was doing fine. He..., doesn't seem to know what he's doing.
<Day 39>
Hello?
You know, I'm not sure how often I should be doing this. The headmaster just gave me this and told me to use it. How long has it even been since I've last used this? Huh. Well, that doesn't really matter all that much. So, whatever, this is entry number two.
Let's get right to it. I am not having a good time here.
I mean, it's better than the old house. The bed's cleaner. There's running water and food for everyone. There are even clothes that actually fit me that don't have holes in them. It's great. Really. It is. And I'm for all of that.
But, this place is really depressing.
None of the other kids seem to realize how liberating it is to be free from things that were only holding them back. They're free to do whatever they want! But, instead, they sit there moping.
Maybe I'm just new to this. I don't know what's keeping the other kids down. Even striking up a conversation with them seems impossible.
Sigh.
Well. At least I can live out my life like this. The headmaster's even letting me study whatever books we have in the library. Other than the depressing atmosphere, I'd say my future's going to be better than I'd ever dreamed.
<Day 40>
Okay.
Two consecutive days of doing this. Not bad, huh? Hehe. Heh. I wish that I'm doing this because I need to, though. And, I kind of wish that I'm doing this under better circumstances.
As it turns out, I don't know anything about this place. Whatever I knew really doesn't say much of what this place actually is. The other kids here, well, they had a good reason to be depressed. Although, it would've helped if they actually told me why. Instead of, you know, finding it out today.
This orphanage, well, is nothing but a place to pick kids up for the military. Or, well, 'drafting,' as the headmaster called it.
I — can't say I expected something like this.
The soldiers busted through the doors of the orphanage. I was there in the lobby when they did. At the time, I was clueless. But, heh, the kids around me weren't. They were terrified. The looks on their faces changed when the soldiers walked past them.
I wouldn't hold it against them. The kids had every reason to be scared. But. Well, I dunno. The soldiers walked past us like we were nothing and headed straight towards the headmaster's office. And, not gonna lie, they were intimidating as all hell.
But, after they spent a few minutes inside the office, the headmaster's speaker system suddenly turned on. They called a few names, ones that I didn't recognize, into the office.
Some of them walked past me on the way there. I didn't catch a glimpse of their faces, but I knew they were terrified. I mean, who could blame them? I certainly couldn't.
The whole time this was happening, I just sat on the corner of the lobby, reading my book. Nobody paid attention to me. And, honestly, I didn't really care.
Fast forward a couple of hours later, here I am recording in a discrete corner of the building. The headmaster called me over not too long ago after the soldiers had already left. He told me that this was unavoidable. It was by law that the soldiers came here and took the other kids away. Kids that were ready to join the military.
Now, okay, I'm not really that smart of a guy. But, it sounded like the headmaster was just giving me excuses. I didn't know why. But, from what I can tell, he did the same thing to the other kids.
Am I supposed to be scared? I don't really know. But, at the very least, I have a good idea of what my future looks like.
Joining the military, huh? Doesn't seem so bad.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein