Kapitel 33: Emperor?
With a deep exhale I began to shrink back down to my regular size. That fight managed to take an absurd toll on my body, the electrical attack that was pumped into me hurt like a bitch! Not to mention the blood gushing from his nose.
Illyanna, Ramsey and Dom came down to check on me accompanied by the fat announcer squid. As my friends fussed over me I watched the fat squid make all his beard tentacles shape themselves into curly fries and he pulled a curtsy. It was weird to look at so I assumed it was some weird alien custom.
"Greetings mighty Rath, I am Vilpol and have been designated as the representative of the Vilgax empire. We would like to know your intentions as the new god emperor of chimera sui generis?"
God emperor? I'm getting war hammer vibes so fuck that mess. "What does being the emperor entail?" Questioned Illyanna.
The fat squid curtsied again and said "firstly as emperor it is your duty to gather resources for our people for the betterment of our people and for the war efforts."
Before he could continue I cut him off "war efforts? Who were you fighting. Was it the Kree?"
The squid scoffed at me "those morons who listen to their Alexa? Nah we are at war with an empire that challenged our own in terms of technological advancement and intelligence. The Zin empire!"
The crowd surrounding us began to boo relentlessly. My friends made a frown and thought of invader zim but I the mighty Rath knew better.
"Is their leader named Zinyak?" I asked, Judging by his scowl it would appear that I am correct. My friends looked at me for an explanation.
"Well I've been to space and I've heard some stuff. The zin empire is led by an alpha off their species named Zinyak. Like Vilgax he was much larger and stronger than the rest of the species. Both groups choose to enslave other worlds but the difference is that the Vilgax empire choose Kombat as their acquisition method were as the zin kidnap the best and brightest before mentally breaking them in simulations."
My words at the time were being broadcasted to earth, several million people shivered at the thought. One chief among them was Nick fury who had frequently experienced the skrull simulators and knew how realistic they can get.
Back with me Vilpol directly asked me "you know of them?! Will you lead us to defeat them. Seeing as we failed to conquer you they may take their own swing at you."
I raised my hand "there is no need, the Zin have a habit of abusing time travel to get what they want. In my mind they have already been defeated, all you have to do is message them the phrase "you got the touch". If they reply "you got the power" then they lost to earthlings in an alternate timeline who are now taking the empire on a joyride."
The entire arena was deadly silent, one squid in the stands then stood up and shouted "he's right, I just messaged my contact in the empire. Their sigil has changed from the red to a purple with a human symbol on it!!!"
The squid then looked back to me so I clapped "war over, next problem" I said pointing at the fat squid. "Well..... we are having resource issues for our most valuable metals."
"You got a version of pym particles?" I asked. He tapped on an ear piece and mumbled in their language before replying "rudimentary quantum physics~ we had that cracked centuries ago."
"Take some of those particles, craft a liquid from it that causes growth or expansion. Then chuck it at the metals. Boom! Infinite rare metals".
Hank pym back on earth spat out his scotch "rudimentary?!?! I'll show those calamari pricks" and then wandered off to scream at an ant farm.
The announcer went slack jawed then coughed and said "well we are underpopulated." Before I cut him off again.
"Humanity discovered viagra, research your species equivalent then just start establishing military bars for soldiers looking to get hitched or get laid. Offer the pregnant woman who frequented those bars a settlement as gratitude for their compensation to the empire. With all that infinite metal you'll need a method to regulate the economy."
The squid just bowed "all hail the almighty Rath" which was seconded by my new empire. A Cheshire grin began to spread on my face before Ramsey tugged my sleeve. I turned and she held up a phone.
I put it to my ear and heard Ororo's voice "your not getting an empire!"
How did she?! Oh yeah the cameras "and why can I not?"
"Because ancient one says you build a Death Star in numerous time lines and things don't go well"
I was silent "but you'd get to be my empress, space jewels, space magic, servants".
The line went silent, I'm pretty sure she muted the call and started arguing with the ancient one about me taking over the empire. While the women in my life debated over whether I should start conquering the universe I turned back to Vilpol.
"So hey, are you guys smart enough to create crystal gems to replace your armies. It'd lower the death rates a bunch. Plus if the zin still wanted a dick measuring competition they could make a gender bent version based on metals and you could have like modelling competitions instead."
Before he could answer the phone unmuted and I heard the ancient one scream "stop talking!!!!!! You don't know the havoc your going to cause!!"
I pursued me lips and looked at the expectant squids. I then spoke "alright, watch space balls then go from there. I'm out, Dom let's roll out. Vilpol give me some of your resources not found on earth along with a connection port for the empires databases."
He handed me an iPad and snapped his fingers. A ship that looked remarkably similar to the guardians of the galaxy arrived. I pushed the button on the iPad to open the ship and found several containers, I opened one and found a ginger version of gold that absorbs heat. Moon girls Christmas present is secure.
Dom drove his car into the ships loading bat whilst Illyanna and Ramsey perused the iPad for alien knowledge. I turned to Vilpol "give me all the stuff you have on magic" so he disappeared before reappearing with a tome. "Your in charge now." Was all I said before I shut the hatch and punched in the coordinates for our original launch position. I'll give Ororo the magic tome as an apology for not making her an empress.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein