Kapitel 11: Chapter 8
MEANINGLESS
The whole night seemed so long. I stayed up late weighing things and trying to understand everything with my young mind. And I finally decided to just let it go and continue my life with Peter.
Siguro panghahawakan ko na lang ang mga sinabi niyang ako ang papakasalan niya. I couldn't let him go. Dahil mas masakit na pakawalan ko siya ng tuluyan at mawala siya sa buhay ko kaysa sa mga nangyayari ngayon. I just have to talk to him that once I'm ready, ako na lang ang gagamitin niya. No more other women.
I planned on calling him tomorrow once I feel better. I just needed more time.
I went downstairs to have a brunch. I saw him on the couch, sitting rigidly with bouquet of pink roses in his hands. I remembered our first time. Three years ago. When everything was easy and smooth.
He snapped his head towards me when my rubber shoes squeaked on the tiled floor.
"Love.." he called me with his husky voice. His lower lip had a cut and a bruise on his left cheek. He looked like hell.
"Everything's cool. You don't need to explain." I said gently. I wanted so bad to feel his warmth and to comfort each other.
"I-i need to. Please. I don't want you to just accept that lie and continue our relationship without addressing our problems. It would affect us." He had a point. So I nodded and pulled him to sit back on our couch.
"Then spill it." I heaved a sigh.
"First, she's just my friend. I never felt anything special towards her. Second that picture was fake. It was photoshopped. Lindsey already asked someone to look into it. Third, you're the only one I want. Believe me love."napatango ako. He never lied to me. I believe him..
I saw his eyes became red and pulled me onto his hard chest and embraced me. He sniffed and whispered how sorry he was.
Lahat ng hinanakit ko ay nawala na. Dahil sa akin pa rin siya sa huli. Akin lang..
Our planned trip to Cebu was early in the morning. We would stay for a week and explore the city. Sobrang excited na ako. This would be our first trip as a couple.
I was waiting on our living room when Kuya Lindsey called me. May inaasikaso lang daw si Peter kaya hindi niya ako masundo.
I just shrugged my shoulders and didn't ask anything. Their company was much more important than fetching me.
"Good morning! Sorry Kuya kung naabala kapa." I greeted Kuya Lindsey happily and kissed him on his cheek. He hugged me tight then let go. He took my luggage and put it in this car boot.
"Anything for you princess.." he said with a smile.
When everything was ready, I sat on his passenger seat.
"There's problem with the cruise ship we'll be in?" Nag aalala kong tanong. I was thinking that maybe Peter would just be busy while on board.
"Nah, just few cargo ships that needed attention." He said then drove stiffly. I could see that he was a bit distracted when he nearly drove with the red traffic light's on.
He pressed the brake and his Mercedes stopped abruptly. I heard him sigh.
Nag aalalang tumingin ako sa kanya. When he didn't notice me, I tugged his sleeve. He looked at me with his dark eyes.
"Are you okay po??"bulong kong tanong. He smiled bitterly and nodded. He then whispered to me.
"When he's too hard to handle, you can have me instead."he said then looked away.
What did he mean by that? Have him instead??..
Then it dawned on me. He wasn't serious right? My heart was beating so fast.
I jumped on my seat when the car horns blasted outside. Then Kuya Lindsey drove the car a bit faster than the allowed speed on the highway.
We arrived at the port in no time. I tried to change the atmosphere by talking to him about any topic I could come up with. And I think it worked because he became relaxed and at ease again.
I was hoping to see Peter waiting for me but he wasn't around. I just contended myself to look around. There were lots of people waiting outside too.
Kuya Lindsey sent me to my cabin and ordered breakfast for us. After an hour, I told him to go home so he could still rest.
He hesitantly bid me good bye and kissed me.
I decided to forget what he told me awhile ago. Because I didn't want to be awkward.
Nang lumipas ang kalahating oras na wala pa si Peter ay lumabas na ako sa cabin ko. Sabi naman ni Kuya Lindsey ay si Peter ang pumili ng cabin ko so alam nya kung saan ako pupuntahan mamaya after nyang matapos sa ginagawa niya.
I roamed around the ship. Then I went to the deck where people were gathered and watching the sun rise. Napangiti ako at kumuha ng picture. When the horn rang and the ship moved out of the port, I ran to the railing and looked at the crews downstairs.
My heart was beating so fast because Peter was still on the port! Naiwan siya!
I ran to the control room to inform the captain. But instead of the captain, si Peter mismo ang nakita ko at ang best friend niya na magkayakap.
The woman's face was planted on his chest and her arms wrapped around his waist tightly. While my boyfriend was caressing her hair gently and whispering something on her ear. They looked so intimate that anyone who could see them will think they were lovers comforting each other.
Napaatras ako at nanlabo ang mga mata sa luhang dire-diretsong pumatak sa pisngi ko.
Were they kidding me?
I thought he was busy doing something on the port. But I was misinformed. He was busy with his best friend..
Penelope tiptoed and reach for Peter's lips. Napatalikod na ako before I could see their lips touch.
Nakita ko na. Ano pa bang gagawin ko? It would be engraved in my head now.
I ran back to my cabin and cried my heart's out. I didn't know why it was so hard to love him. So hard..
I woke up when I felt my bed moving. Napaupo ako. Then looked around. I shook my head when I remember that I was in the ship with them. I saw food tray on the table.
I stretched my arms and went straight to have shower. When I was done, I ate the cold food slowly while thinking of something to do para hindi ako maboring. Kasi Peter was preoccupied with someone.
I went through the flyers and saw their pool and loungers. I might just take a dip and bathe in the sun. So I changed into my pink two piece swimsuit and donned it with my white cover up. I took my key card and small bag with my lotion and phone inside. I quietly walked towards the swimming pool. It was so crowded that I found it hard to get a spot.
Luckily, a family left their lounger so I quickly took it and removed my cover up. Napalingon ako ng may anino na tumapat sa akin habang naglalagay ako ng sunblock lotion.
It was from a tall boy with a friendly smile. He has chinky eyes, red lips, and chiseled jaw. Handsome. He has toned body and six pack abs.
Halatang galing sa pool because he was dripping wet.
He took the towel on the lounger next to mine and sat while still looking at me.
"Do you want some help?" He asked with his deep voice.
I raised my brow. Then continued what I'm doing.
"You can't reach your back.." he said again.
"No thanks." I replied curtly.
"You're filipina?" He asked again. Sobrang chatty naman nito. Hindi ba niya nararamdaman na ayoko ng may kausap?
"I'm Carl. What's your name?" When I didn't answer he went to my side and started asking me questions again.
"Can you keep quiet?" Masungit kong tanong. He just smiled at me and pulled his lounger to get near me.
"I want to be your friend." He said.
"And I don't."
"Well, how about you tell me your name then I'll leave you alone?" Napataas ang kilay ko. Anong meron ba sa pangalan ko?
"Shanelle." I answered then adjust my lounger so I could lie flat.
"Ang ganda ng araw ngayon." He said. Talagang hindi ata ako tatantanan nito.
But then he stopped talking so I cocked my head to his direction. I was shocked to see him sleeping peacefully.
Ambilis niyang nakatulog! I had a dip and all but he was still sleeping. I didn't want to be mean so I woke him up when the sun was starting to hurt my skin. He was also fair skinned so baka magka sun burnt siya.
He opened his chinky eyes and blinked a couple of time. He's cute. If I'm not mistaken, he was nearly same as my age. Or few years older..
"Buti naman ginising mo ako. Kundi patay ako sa mommy ko nito. You understand me right?" Napatango lang ako. He's a guy but he really talks a lot.
Soon I was talking and laughing with him. He's fun to be with. We exchanged numbers and decided to eat lunch together. I told Carl to see me in the dining hall, then bid my goodbye.
I looked once more and people started to leave the pool for lunch.
Bigla akong kinabahan nang makatapat ako sa pintuan ng cabin ko. I scanned my card and the door opened. I found Peter looking gravely at me. He was clenching his jaw. Like something made him upset.
"So you're having fun without me?"he said.
I furrowed my eyebrows. "You're away, so what do you want me to do, magmukmok dito?"i shot back. Bigla akong nainis. Siya ang busy sa aming dalawa. Tapos kung makaasta siya parang may ginawa akong masama.
"You didn't even tell me where you're going! You're my responsibility Loveria!" He said then clenched his jaw.
Biglang sumakit ang dibdib ko. So responsibilidad lang pala niya ako? Dapat pala hindi nalang niya ako isinama!
"Then just let me be! I don't need you!" Gigil kong sigaw at lumakad papuntang banyo.
"You don't need me? Why? Because of that boy?"he
"Oo! I like him too. So can you just leave me alone? I need to get ready because he's waiting for me!" I answered without looking at him. I closed the bathroom door then leaned on it. My heart was a wreck. I really regret coming here. Excited pa naman ako. But it seemed like I wouldn't enjoy it as much as I was thinking before. I heard my door closes outside so I quickly had shower and put my dress on.
I covered my pain with a smile when I saw Carl waiting for me outside the dining hall.
"You should have just waited inside!" I laughed softly. He grinned at me and held me elbow to guide me on the two seater dining table.
Nang makapag order kami at habang kumakain ay marami na kaming napagkwentuhan. He was taking up Engineering and on his second year. And they were the owner of Silva's. My favourite restaurant! I couldn't believe my luck!
I was talking animatedly with Carl when Penelope hit our table. Buti nalang hindi natapon ang milkshake namin. I looked at her with furrowed eyebrows.
"You're having fun,aren't you slut?"she said acidly.
I laughed haughtily. Ako pa ngayon ang slut sa aming dalawa.
"But of course. How about you?..oh I remember, you're just borrowing what's mine pala. How was he?" I sneered.
Gamit ang nanginginig niyang kamay ay kinuha niya ang baso ko at isinaboy sa akin. But I managed to dodge it. Mabilisan ko ring hinablot ang strawberry milkshake ko at itinapon sa kanya ang laman.
Napasinghap siya pati na ang mga nanonood.
"You have to know your enemy first before you attack them Penelope." I said.
"Like you said, I'm just relying on my parents money so you should know that I'm capable enough to bring you down." I said sternly.
"Loveria! What have you done?!" I cocked my head to Peter who was looking at me darkly. He clenched his jaw when he saw his best friend soaking in my milkshake.
Penelope ran to him and cried. Parang aping api.
"Oh.. what a nice scene." I commented smiling then sat back on my chair calmly. But deep inside i was bleeding. So hard. I hid my trembling hands and played with my bangle. I would throw this when I got a chance. This was meaningless anyway.
"Don't be sassy and tell me what's going on!" My smile faded.
"Why don't you ask your best friend Mr Allison?" I suggested coldly. Penelope shook her head while sobbing. Ang galing umarte.
"We have to talk Loveria. Stop being a spoiled brat and immature." What he said ripped my heart. He just came up to us, concluding without knowing the truth and now I'm the spoiled brat? Sa dami nang pang iintindi ko sa kanya at sa babae nya, immature pa pala ako?
If my looks could kill, I would definitely kill these two.
"Excuse me Mr Allison your friend started this-"
"I'm not talking to you boy."putol ni Peter sa sasabihin ni Carl.
Bigla sumiklab ang galit sa dibdib ko.
"Talk? How can we talk kung najudge mo na kung anong nangyari. You won't even listen to him who saw what happened!" Sigaw ko at nanginging ang katawan na tumayo.
"And why don't you fucking ask all the people here who fucking started this fucking drama?!"sigaw ko.
"Stop swearing! That's very unladylike!"sagot ni Peter.
Napatawa ako. Unladylike pa pala ako. Ilang insulto paba ang lalabas sa bibig ng mahal ko?
"I know what is very very unladylike Mr Allison. This!"mahinahon akong lumapit sa kanya at tinuhod siya.
Napasinghap ang mga tao na nanonood sa amin.
Napaluhod si Peter sa sakit. Agad umalalay si Penelope sa kanya.
Kinuha ko ang smoothie ni Carl at binuhusan si Peter sa ulo. Namimilipit sa sakit na napapikit lang si Peter.
"Ooppss.. I'm so sorry, it slipped out of my grasp." I said but there was no trace of regret in my tone.
"Let's go outside Carl. I have an allergic reactions to stupid people."hinila ko na si Carl palabas. My voice cold as ice.
He grabbed me when my knees wobbled. Then quietly guided me towards the pool.
I sighed with my heart crying. This never gets old.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein