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43.58% whateverwhatever / Chapter 17: CHAPTER 34: CAT VS WATER

Kapitel 17: CHAPTER 34: CAT VS WATER

Defei and Bukkaru stare at each other on the battlefield.

"Come and hit me." Bukkaru transmits to Defei.

Defei: Have you fully healed?

"Yeah, come hit me!"

Defei smiles.

Defei: Okay!

Kofron steps in front of Defei and waves his hands around.

Kofron: Hey! Hold up! I gotta announce the match first!

Kofron clears his throat and holds the megaphone up.

"On my right side is Defei! The Water- slinging warrior! And on my left is the cat that can turn into a buff man!"

"Let the sixth match begin!"

Kofron coughs loudly multiple times.

"Also, this is the last match I'm narrating! I'm losing my damn voice."

Defei dashes and kicks Bukkaru into the air. Bukkaru flies high and transforms mid-air and lands back down, he flexes his muscles.

Bukkaru: Yes! I feel so refreshed after a good, healing nap!

He glances over at Defei.

Strong straight lines of water quickly shoot out of the back of Defei's feet, the water passes and soaks his shoes. Defei is lifted into the air and propelled forward quickly.

Bukkaru stops flexing and his eyes widen.

Bukkaru: You've got like a jetpack!

"Defei has a jetpack attached to his feet!"

Defei flies past Bukkaru, Bukkaru's eyes follow, Defei then swerves back and hovers away from Bukkaru.

Defei: I guess you could call it that!

Bukkaru: Heh, this'll be like swatting bugs or trying to catch those stupid lasers I can never get!

Defei flies over and around Bukkaru multiple times.

Defei: Don't compare me to a bug, man.

Bukkaru tries multiple times to grab Defei from the air but fails.

Bukkaru: … You're literally acting like a bug.

Defei then appears in front of Bukkaru and goes for a kick in the face, Bukkaru quickly blocks and tries to grab Defei again. He misses and Defei flies off.

Defei continues flying around Bukkaru and trying to land hits on him, Defei seems to be getting faster and starts circling Bukkaru.

"Defei is speeding up! It's getting nauseous to look at! Maybe that's his goal? Because that's what it's doing to me! I might vomit!" Kofron comments.

Bukkaru: Now you're a real annoying bug! I'll catch you eventually!

Defei: ... I won't accept this name-calling. I'm not a bug bro.

He lands away from Bukkaru but is in his sight and starts rotating his arm and shoulder as if getting ready to throw a heavy punch.

Defei: Alright, I've pumped myself up… Say, you think a bug can do this?

Bukkaru stares curiously. Defei points his palms at him, after a few seconds, a small amount of water spurts out of them.

Bukkaru: Uh?

Defei: It's coming… You might wanna step back.

"... I know I'm gonna step back so cat man you should too." Kofron adds.

Bukkaru takes multiple steps back and then stops.

Defei shoots water out of his palms, it comes out aggressively and fast, Bukkaru scoffs, stares in boredom, and doesn't move, he crosses his arm.

Bukkaru: Wow, just cuz I'm a cat, you think water will scare me? That's offensive!

The water then hits Bukkaru's forearm, suddenly he yelps in pain and quickly jumps away.

Bukkaru: Oh my fucking god! It's hot!

Defei: Boiling hot water is something you should be scared of though.

Defei's stream of water disappears.

Bukkaru: You shoot hot water… I- I can deal with that.

Defei shoots water again, the streams go a far distance. Defei moves his hands around so that the water can hit more things, Bukkaru turns into gas.

"... So the water coming out of his hands is endless, the speed doesn't change either, how am I supposed to avoid it?.. Oh, I can go around it if I'm fast enough."

Bukkaru solidifies, dashes around, and appears in front of Defei ready to punch. Water quickly shoots out of Defei's foot which boosts the speed of his kicking, So Defei kicks Bukkaru in the chin before he can do anything, the water from Defei's palms stops.

Bukkaru eats the kick and starts throwing fast punches, Defei quickly parries the punches and hits Bukkaru with his own. Suddenly their palms link together and Bukkaru and Defei hold each other in place.

Bukkaru: I finally caught you.

Defei: I guess you did. But most bugs have a defense mechanism and so do I.

Bukkaru: There is no bug that has hot water as a defense mechanism.

Defei: Hmm, maybe it's undiscovered? Anyways, you might wanna let go of my hands.

Bukkaru starts feeling a burning sensation on his palms.

"Ah! I need to move!"

Bukkaru turns into gas and as Defei's water passes by, he solidifies and tries to quickly uppercut Defei.

Defei quickly reacts and blasts himself away with water before he's hit, as he flies off he makes sure to angle the water to hit Bukkaru in the face. The water hits Bukkaru's eyes, he grabs them and groans in pain as he stumbles around.

Bukkaru: … What's wrong with you!? I'm gonna go blind!

Defei: Nah, you'll be alright. Liz will heal it eventually!.. I think?

Defei lands and spins to set himself up for another attack. He blasts himself to Bukkaru, does a spin midair and kicks Bukkaru in the face then shoots him with even more water, blood sprays out of Bukkaru's nose.

Defei keeps blasting himself around and continues slamming his feet into Bukkaru. Bukkaru jumps away and finally opens his eyes.

Bukkaru: Jeez! Calm down, man!

Defei: I am calm though? Like really calm.

Bukkaru turns into gas as Defei flies towards him. Bukkaru solidifies and grabs Defei by his legs, Defei quickly shoots water at Bukkaru's face but he doesn't let go, instead, he smiles. Bukkaru throws Defei away.

Bukkaru: This hot water is nothing to me anymore! It's just like sticking your head into a hot tub. I'm actually quite a big fan of hot water!

Defei laughs.

Defei: Like a hot tub? They should fire whoever's in charge of the hot tubs you were in then since my water can burn skin off.

Bukkaru: … What do you mean? My skin is fine.

Defei stares at Bukkaru very seriously.

Defei: … That's because I haven't turned the heat up all the way. I don't wanna actually burn your skin off now.

Bukkaru: … That's considerate of you, but you already burned my fucking eyes man.

Bukkaru dashes toward Defei, he doesn't move and shoots water, Bukkaru continues forward and is touched by the water, he yelps and jumps back.

Bukkaru: You're kidding me!

Defei: I can also shoot out really cold water.

Bukkaru: Okay, Okay, cold, I can get used to that. I have taken-

"... I've never taken a cold shower! Oh god."

Defei stares at him confused, Bukkaru takes a long deep breath and dashes toward Defei.

Bukkaru: It's just water! It's just water! I can resist the temperature! I can get used to-

water touches Bukkaru's toe and he leaps into the air in fright, after landing he dashes away.

Defei quickly flies towards Bukkaru and kicks him in the face, Bukkaru barely flinches and throws multiple punches at Defei, Defei flies off and above Bukkaru.

Above Bukkaru, Defei shoots down cold water at him, some of it almost touches Bukkaru.

Bukkaru goes into his gas form, Defei continues to shoot water and doesn't stop while flying around.

Bukkaru: Wow, so now you're just gonna keep shooting water at me, you're gonna force me to stay in my gas form. This is animal abuse.

Defei: I'm not forcing you, you can come out any time… Also, you're a grown-ass man right now. No animals in sight.

Bukkaru looks up as the water passes through him.

"... It's just water, I can get hit, I can get used to how cold it is."

Bukkaru solidifies and is instantly hit with the water, he grits his teeth and jumps up into the air, and tries to smack Defei down.

Defei grabs his arm and quickly throws him down and dashes towards him. Bukkaru reacts and throws several punches once he lands. Defei dodges them all and then uppercuts Bukkaru.

Bukkaru stumbles back and grabs his face. Defei moves back a little then propels himself forward, spins, and slams his feet into Bukkaru's face, then he uses even more water to slam Bukkaru into the floor while still on his face.

Defei flies off, Bukkaru slowly gets up and groans.

Bukkaru: … I'm done, man… I forfeit this match.

Defei: … You forfeit? Seriously?

Bukkaru: I wanna go to sleep! I don't wanna deal with this shit anymore.

Bukkaru turns into a cat, everyone watches as he walks away and flops on the floor.

"... The winner is Defei! Because the cat man got tired!.. Also I'm out!"

Kofron drops the megaphone while coughing loudly and walks away to take a seat next to the guardians.

Defei shrugs and walks away.

TO BE CONTINUED…


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