Kapitel 110: Ch110. When personal morals and mission clash, its time to troll

Team Downpour was standing on a small hill as the sun rose behind their back, bathing them in orange light while they observed their new supposed target, a miner town called Tanera. The town that was the target of the second part of their mission.

Mei frowned and crossed her arms under her nonexistent chest as she looked at the town, squinting her eyes in annoyance. "Are we really going to massacre the civilians?" She asked a bit peeved, not really caring about the lives of strangers. Nevertheless, she was irked to be ordered to kill someone who can't defend himself. After all, killing an army of mercenaries who can't even swing a blade properly and killing untrained kids and defenceless, weaponless people are two different things. She would rather not...

"Of course not." Konan snorted at how ridiculous the notion of them slaughtering unsuspecting civilians sounded. Sure, in their missions they razed a few castles to the ground but with hordes of clones and the spying abilities of her paper? It could not be easier to find out who was actually deserving to be drowned and who not. Nor was it difficult to relocate the people deemed innocent away before they actually struck. It's not like they went in and just dumped a large area of effect Jutsu, not caring who would be hit. There was a reason why they were the go-to demolition experts...

It was not like they never killed an innocent either. That was something unavoidable in their profession. Nobody who was chunin at least for a half-year already ever avoided doing that. Whether as collateral damage or target of assassination... it was a part of the job and Konan made sure Mei knew that and made her peace with it before she even became a genin. Rei didn't believe in not preparing Mei for these tough choices beforehand to 'preserve' her childhood. He would rather have her prepared and take some childlike happiness from her life rather than dead later on.

But neither Konan nor Rei would ever slaughter an entire town just because it was 'asked' of them. They lived through the war in Amegakure and the assault of Konoha ninjas on their town. Neither of them really wanted to be seen in the position of the Konoha ninjas.

"Well, technically," Rei quipped in an amused tone, "it was never outright stated we have to kill. They said 'distract' and that's exactly what we will do." He stated, earning himself a chuckle from Konan before she lovingly kissed him on the cheek.

'Never outright stated, my ass.' She mentally laughed. 'Sure, the Mizukage never said it out loud but it was implied in such a manner only a mentally retarded person would miss it. Guess this was the reason why he burned our orders after reading them, pretending to lose them.' She noted with mirth shining in her eyes.

'Uwa~, trust Rei to understand the orders however it fits him.' Mei thought in deadpan as she desperately tried to prevent the corners of her lips tugging upwards.

...

Tanera was an important town in the Land of Fire. It was the main mining town in the entire southwestern section of the country and it was also the only place in the Land of Fire where chakra metal could be mined. This led many blacksmiths to settle into the town and many famous forging companies were established and resided in the town. Tanera was the main supplier of the highest quality chakra weapons in the country. Not to mention they were also one of the main suppliers of kunai, ninja wire, and shurikens as well.

Because of its importance, Tanera had always thirty ANBU stationed in the town and now during the war, a regiment of a hundred ninja was added to it. Most of these were only chunins but it was still one of the most defended places in the country if one added around two thousand Fire Country Samurai courtesy of Daimyo. Despite being far from the borders and since the Land of Wind was an ally of the Land of Fire in this war, there was literally no threat to the town whatsoever. And yet, the stationed troops inside were numerous. The town was just that important.

So... why was the town in complete disarray?

The first people who realized something was wrong were the miners. When they came to the mines in a merry mood and started to use their pickaxes, a smoke engulfed them and they suddenly found themselves holding a bouquet of origami flowers. The miners quickly started looking for working pickaxes only to find none. In their places were just more bouquets with an awkward message of, 'Don't pick axes, pick up girls!'

Without their tools, they could not mine so the dejected miners went back home while grumbling under their noses. At that time, they didn't yet know there was no pickaxe left in the entire town courtesy of Konan and her lazy humor. The worst part? She made sure to steal every bit of ore and any ingot she found in the entire village and stored them in her storage dimension alongside the mining tools, effectively crippling the mining and forging business in the town.

Rei had a bit more vicious thing in mind and the next group of people who noticed something amiss in the town were the samurai and ninjas. Poor fellas didn't even have the time to deal with the complaints of miners and forgers alike due to the theft of ingots.

The Samurai suddenly found themself missing their swords and all hell broke loose as they ran around the town, looking literally everywhere in a frenzied madness induced by sword deficiency. One poor guy was even flipping the skirts of women, wondering if he would find some holy sword underneath them.

The Ninjas, on the other hand, wondered how they could lose their forehead protectors. The forehead protectors were very important to them. They had the function of identification tag and losing it was a mark of utter shame. Needless to say, they also looked all around the town in frenzy and for them, Rei prepared a small surprise. Many ninjas found their forehead protectors in places riddled with childish traps and by the time they managed to retrieve them, they were either repainted to rainbow glory by paint bombs or got closely reacquainted with sticky feather bombs courtesy of all the generous chickens in the town who now sported a new fashion style. Bald one.

When the ninjas after hours of effort to get their precious forehead protectors back finally managed to do so and put them on their foreheads, these protectors just burst into smoke... many ninjas became bald that day while having 'Shine YOUTH!' tattooed on their heads by some non-removable seal that prevented hair from growing. Frankly, Jiraiya was quite busy in the upcoming months.

Mei was told to target the forges and she decided to go childishly into it. The walls of every forgery were repainted to look like a sky with a rainbow. The thick grey protective aprons were changed for frilly pink thin ones used for cooking sporting nice unicorns. Many housewives would miss their aprons later that day but Mei really needed something as a base to create her 'Super Duper Cute Aprons of Embarrassing Doom'. She didn't forget to add itching powder from the inner parts either! Nor the small genjutsu that would make them appear as the protective aprons for thirty minutes before dissipating. Mei only needed the smiths to put them on since she made sure to ask Rei to inscribe a strong sticking seal to them. No way the blacksmiths could take it off anytime soon. She only wondered how they would solve the problem of peeing with them on. Oh, well, not her problem. Her next target was the safes in the forgeries and they were also completely cleaned out by Mei as instead of money, shé deposited tons of pink toilet paper.

At the end of the day, the peaceful village was quite quiet but underneath that mask of normalcy, this day was a disaster for the town that lost its ability to supply the ninjas with weapons and mine the chakra metal. Needless to say, both Hokage and the Daimyo would have to be informed.

Unknown to the poor victims, the Team Downpour was just starting. After all, they had a few months to waste since they didn't want to return before the attack on the northern shores was over. Lazying and terrorizing the townsfolk of Tanera from the shadows seemed much, much more fun.

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Kapitel 111: Ch111. Northern Shores 1

The Hokage was standing above a table with a huge map of the northern shores of the Land of Fire, loudly banging his fist onto the table with passion as he explained his tactics and asked the other men in the tent about their opinion. Around him, his most trusted aides and the most powerful ninjas from Konoha that he could afford to relieve from their previous posts listened with rapt attention, occasionally giving their own two cents to the battle plans.

Hiruzen felt drained. The town of Tanera was supposedly heavily harassed by pranks of all things and he could not dispatch anyone with the current situation so their disposable weapon supply suffered. Worse yet, the economy around Tanera was collapsing and many people already moved out. The Daimyo demanded something to be done about it because Tanera mines were the only place with chakra metal, therefore very profitable for the country. But when Hiruzen was about to send Jiraiya to Tanera to find and skin alive anyone causing trouble there during wartime with pointless pranks... The toad sage appeared very pensive and troubled. Apparently, the warning from Tsunade was real and Konoha now had to protect the Land of Fire from the biggest invasion to their lands since the first shinobi war. Oh, joy...

In the end, nobody was sent to Tanera. Another problem was to find out who to send to defend against the Kiri invasion. When Jiraiya told him the estimated numbers of Kiri ninjas, Hiruzen quickly decided to take a more hands-on approach and go himself, dragging a lot of strong ninjas from their posts from the Kumo front or Grass front. Even the outposts closest to the Land of Wind were almost emptied, leaving only 20% of its occupants as the others were ordered to one-by-one relocate towards the new make-shift camp close to the northern shores of the Land of Fire while being discreet about it. The gathering of Konoha forces commenced... and if Jiraiya's estimate was to be trusted, Hiruzen was still facing a situation where Konoha was outnumbered one to four Kiri ninjas.

Which led Hiruzen to the current situation. He furiously hammered his fist onto the poor innocent table as his eyes sparkled with fury while he was sweeping the uncomfortable and nervous people around him with his piercing glare.

"What do you mean, Tsunade is not coming, Jiraiya!?" Hiruzen bellowed, causing some less experienced ninjas in the command tent to take a step back from the intensity of his voice. Hiruzen, while glad he still had it in him and was capable of making even someone as strong as Jiraiya squirm like a little genin, was utterly furious at what he just heard.

"Sensei, you see, Tsun-" Pale-faced Jiraiya unsurely tried to explain but Hiruzen interrupted him by grabbing the note he was clutching in his hands as if his life depended on it.

Hiruzen looked at it and started reading out loud. "Yo, old monkey," Just from that bit he knew he would not like what would follow. The only time Tsunade called him 'old monkey' was when she was angry with him or trying to use it as a form of endearment to 'borrow' some money from him. Just the thought sent chills run down his spine as he subconsciously straightened up with a gulp, his anger quickly forgotten. "You would not believe what happened!" Hiruzen frowned. "I, the head of Konoha hospital, found an order to leave Konoha hospital! I have really no idea what kind of idiot could sanction something like that! Honesty..." He could almost feel Tsunade's fake disappointment and mockery of her tone as he read her message. Many people in the command tent shuffled at that, not knowing what to do as they knew it was the Council and the Hokage who wrote that order. What Tsunade did was incredible disrespect towards them. "So~, just thought I will let you know I am not coming. Cheers!"

Hiruzen raised his eyes from the letter from Tsunade and his frosty eyes trailed over the form of every single council member who was in attendance. "You did not tell her directly?" He asked quietly but his voice started rising. "You sent a fucking ORDER? To someone like Tsunade? Are the heads of you, dipshits, completely empty or what!?" Hiruzen panted harshly. For two weeks he was stuck in this camp to give orders and organize defence against Kiri forces, leaving the village in the hands of the Council. They were supposed to persuade Tsunade. Meaning giving her some incentive to join rather than flat out ordering her. He knew his apprentice and that never worked well. And yet, his 'esteemed' Council did precisely that and Tsunade decided to blow her gasket by saying proverbial 'fuck you'. As disappointed as that simple fact made him, Hiruzen understood Tsunade's actions as she was treated somewhat coldly by Konoha's higher-ups as of late.

Suddenly, one newer ninja, barely a boy who just reached chunin rank thanks to his ability to survive during the war, timidly raised his hand, making Hiruzen nod at him in a sign he can speak. "Lord Third... isn't Tsunade-sama still a ninja from Konoha, therefore bound to follow orders? Isn't justice on the side of the Council?"

Hiruzen just stared at the fool. "You naive idiot." He groaned, tired of it all. Tired of the war, of the general stupidity he had to deal with each day, of being attacked from every side. "Can you even imagine what kind of influence Tsunade has? Do you really think I could force her, you fool?" He drawled irritably, causing the new chunin to show a disgruntled expression. "But no, Tsunade is no longer a Konoha ninja since she left after the second war. She is officially retired and effectively a clan head of the Senju clan. That makes me unable to call her back to duty from her retirement as retired clan heads have certain... privileges." Hiruzen explained patiently, showing that his title of Professor was quite fitting.

"Sensei, I think you should look at the other side of the letter." Jiraiya suddenly spoke with a wince. Hiruzen narrowed his eyes and did so, finding a reference for a page in the newest edition of the Bingo Book which made him quite baffled. Before he could ask, however, Jiraiya just handed him a small black book. "Tsunade sent it alongside her letter." He added.

Hiruzen browsed through the book until he found the page Tsunade referenced and instantly paled a new shade of white as he saw something he never thought possible in his long life of strife. Something that made feel creep into his heart and shook him to his core.

Something even the fabled Hiruzen Sarutobi didn't expect.

---

Mei of Kiri

Affiliation: Kiri - rank unknown, Team Downpour - 3rd member.

Prowess - SS-rank.

Bounty - 250,000,000 Ryo (Iwagakure) - preferably dead.

Strength - Steam-based bloodline(?), Good at Taijutsu and weaponry, Exceptional reaction time, and superb chakra sensory abilities.

Info: A new team member of Team Downpour who single-handedly wiped out 10 000 strong force gathered by Iwagakure to deal with the Team Downpour, leaving only a single survivor.

---

"An SS-rank." Hiruzen said reverently as he remembered the feats of his teacher and Hashirama Senju. Child soldiers were a common sight on the battlefield but to think a girl of thirteen could get SS-ranking... Hiruzen was utterly speechless and could only hope the girl was far away from the soon-to-be battle between Konoha and Kiri. Inwardly, Hiruzen was very grateful for the heads-up from Tsunade as his eyes hardened. 'Kid or not... I will not hesitate if she shows up!'

Honestly, if she knew his thought process, she would just roll her eyes at him in exasperation.

Nevertheless, the name Mei of Kiri started to spread through the world like fire through the woods. A new SS-rank, the first one in more than half a century, was finally born, sending chills through the collective spines of many higher-ups of many villages. Rei could only snicker at the thought that it was actually Mei, his youngest apprentice, who attained such a rank even before him.

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