Kapitel 12: The definition of being ridiculous

I had no recollection of what Malfoy and Ron were talking – no, let me rephrase that – arguing about. All I did was standing there and completely zoned out. What could I possibly do? Stop them from verbally attacking each other? Don't be ridiculous.

Then I felt someone grabbed me by the wrist. It was Malfoy. He started leading me away without saying anything and neither did I ask. Ron's voice was slowly fading behind me and I didn't care to listen. My mind was like a swirling liquid, turning round and round and not knowing when it would stop.

He finally stopped when were in a quiet hall. He looked at me with sorrow in those gray eyes, to which I couldn't comprehend. His already pale face was even paler, buried in the shadow of the dim candlelight. It was as if he decided to bury himself in the darkness. My heart ached, yet I could do nothing.

"Let's go find a place to sit down," he suggested. I nodded. He found an empty classroom and locked the door behind him. It was empty and cold in this classroom, much like how I was feeling at the moment.

I pulled two chairs and arranged them to face each other. He took his seat in silence. And so did I.

"What were you trying to tell me before Ron showed up?" I asked carefully.

He sighed as if he was trying to hide something. I moved my sight to outside the window. It was warm and sunny but how come it was so incredibly cold here? I didn't know what to expect from him, I had no clue what he was about to say. So, I bit my lips and waited for him to answer.

"Hermione, do you love me?" The words came out so casual that one could mistake them as a weather talk. He stared at the floor as he asked, and he kept his eyes lowered while waiting for a response.

Was I ready to answer truthfully?

"I…"

"No, don't answer," he smiled bitterly and sighed when he saw the confusion on my face. "Do you think I'm a coward? I'm selfish, weak, and incapable of dealing with my own emotions. Don't tell me your answer, because I know what it would be. Words are magical, and that's why you cannot speak of them. Just like how I cannot tell you either. I know you probably will never forgive me, for I can't give you a promise."

"No, that's not true!" I exclaimed. "Why would I think that of you? Draco, I understand how you feel. We are both too young to make certain decisions that may affect the rest of our lives. However, why wouldn't you let me say it? Why are you denying it? If we are destined to be star-crossed, then does it really hurt if we just admit it?"

I refused to cry. If I did, that would break his heart. I didn't want to break his heart.

"I hate you, Granger. Do you know that I hate you?" He sounded agitated, though I could see him blush.

"I know," I said softly, "and I hate you too for the same reason."

"Yes, indeed. I hate you to the extreme and that turned into love. Yes, I do love you. Are you satisfied now? What an evil witch! I love you to the point that I don't want to leave you. What more do you want me to say?" His voice cracked. I knew how torn he was on the inside. I placed my finger on his thin lips to quietly ask him to calm down. That bit of melancholy in his eyes was tearing me into pieces.

"I love you too," I smiled.

"The next Quidditch game, which team do you hope that would win?" He eventually calmed down and asked in his usual tone.

"I hope you catch the golden snitch, but Gryffindor would win in the end," I was still smiling.

"That's a good answer," he smiled as well, "but we'll win."

"Sure, you will," I tried to lighten the mood.

Do you know that the furthest distance in this world is the distance between us? It doesn't matter if we love each other, we simply can't and will not end up together. I'd never watch you to give up anything for me because I don't think I'm worth it. We are too far apart and belong to separate worlds. But I won't regret falling in love with you, just like I know you won't either.

"There's something else I have to tell you," his face turned solemn again.

"What would that be?" I frowned and had a bad feeling about what was coming.

'Remember the day we decided on the contract and went to get coffee?" He said slowly, trying to find his words.

My heart dropped.

"What have you done?" I couldn't help but raised my voice. "Did you put a potion in it? Of course, you did! Let me think, what would that possibly be? Oh, I know. You want your revenge on the Gryffindors. How entertaining would it be if you get Hermione Granger to date you? But wait, what if she actually falls in love with you? Worry not, just put a potion in her drink so that she won't remember you once the contract is up. Guess what, you fell into your own trap. Am I right?"

His eyes widened and I could not long hold back my tears. When he wrapped his arms around me, I didn't move away.

"You are the cleverest witch of your time," he kissed me on my cheek. "I'm sorry, I know we don't have much time left."

"Sorry doesn't cut it, does it?" I said sarcastically as my ears rang. "It's fine. We still have a month or so left. After that, just cast a spell on you and forget about what happened between us. Live your life and we shall go on separate paths."

"No, I won't do that," he buried his face in my neck. "I'll always love you. Screw the bloodline, I'll take you away. I can't just watch you go on without me."

The temptation was dangerous, and I gave in to it.

"These violent delights have violent ends / And in their triumph die, like fire and powder / Which as they kiss consume."