Kapitel 5: Chapter 5: Childhood Arc
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Sakura would have been more useful.
Playing the Role of the Byakugan Princess
Childhood Arc
Chapter five
I pause in front of the classroom door and take a deep breathe. Ever since the scene Kō created to me about Naruto yesterday, I have been dreading seeing him today. What if he hates me now? He probably thinks I am going to shun him now like almost every other person in the village. Either way, I can't hover in the hallway forever. I need to go in before I am considered late and my instructor gets upset with me. As I enter the room, I notice Naruto sitting beside of Sasuke, who is participating in his daily hobby and looking out the window. Naruto is poking Sasuke's hair with a pencil and whispering "teme… teme… psst hey teme" over and over again. As I walk up the steps to get to my desk, our eye meet. I give him a warm smile. He opens his mouth to say something, but just widens his eyes at me before casting them away. I frown as I sit down. What kind reaction was that? He seems hesitate. I wonder why?
The next few hours went by slowly as usual. I pretend to take notes while I am really reviewing the notes I wrote last night from Chakra Control for Beginners. I had decided to hide them at the bottom of my toy chest. Nobody but me ever goes through it anyways. Last night, when I was suppose to be asleep, I stayed up a couple of hours and looked up the first few chapters of the book and took notes on the more important things. It seems like the easiest place to start practicing chakra control is in a person's hands. I assume that is one of the reasons why Academy students learn ninjutsus that require hand signs such as the Clone Jutsu. Clone Jutsu is a good one for a child to learn because you have to exert out just enough chakra, not any more or any less, or your clone will come out as a flop. I already have some chakra control practice going on from being able to slip a little into my eyes to activate my Byakugan. I haven't made out a schedule yet on when and where I want to practice chakra control, but I will worry about that later.
Before long, Ruki-sensei is telling us that it is lunch time. Everyone immediately breaks off into their little groups like they have everyday for the past month, while I sit alone. As I watch Naruto while I eat, I see that Sasuke must be in one of his moods today because he is ignoring Naruto. During these times, Naruto would just give up and go sit with me to talk. Right now, he is unusually quiet as he picks at his own food. I sigh. I guess I will have to be the one that has to approach the other person first. I get out of my seat as I make my way over to Naruto. I can feel everyone's eyes on me as I do so. They aren't used to the weird quiet kid in the back to actually speak to someone first or rather get out of her seat at all unless it is to leave class for the day.
I tap Naruto's head and mimicked what he did earlier to Sasuke. "Naruto… Naruto… psst hey Naruto!" Out of the reflection of the window, I swear I see Sasuke smirk before it drops back into its usual frown. Someone call the Daimyō! I just made Sasuke smile! Or I am probably just imagining things. Sasuke doesn't believe in smiling.
Naruto glances up at me. "Yeah?"
I cross my arms to appear mad. "Well, that isn't someway to greet someone when they want you to sit with them."
Naruto's face instantly brightens up. "Y-you really want me to sit with you still?" he asks.
I shrug nonchalantly. "Yeah, why not? You do sometimes anyways. Don't act like this is the first time."
Naruto holds up a finger. "But, I'm just asking because yesterday-"
I cover his mouth with my hand. "Sshhh, we aren't going to talk about that."
"Mmmmm mmmm mmm mmm mm," Naruto mumbles from behind his covered mouth. I drag him back to my desk and we both sit down. "Why aren't we going to talk about yesterday? I surely thought you hated me now since your babysitter doesn't want you to be around me."
I arch an eyebrow. "That doesn't make any sense. Why would I hate you just because of someone else?"
Naruto lower his eyes. "Everytime I try to play with someone, their parents usually badmouth me to them in front of me or yell at me and call me bad names," he explains, almost in a whisper. He clenches his fist. "And I don't understand why they do that. They act like I'm some kind of monster. I've never done anything terrible to anyone."
I stay silent for a moment as the pain in his voice hits me. A five year old should never feel like this and be mistreated so badly. I rest my hand on his shoulder. "Well, those people are stupid. I don't think you're a monster or anything bad. You're Uzumaki Naruto and you want to become Hokage one day."
Naruto grins as he pumps his fist into the air. "You bet I do! I'm going to become the greatest Hokage! That way the whole village will stop disrespecting me and treat me like I'm somebody, somebody important!" Oh gosh, there's the famous lines that he says ten thousand more times throughout his life.
"Well, when you do, I will be one of the first to cheer and bow down to you," I promise him.
Naruto continues to grin as his happiness radiates like a sunray throughout the classroom. You wouldn't be able to tell that he was upset just a minute ago. "You know, you're the first person that actually believes in my dream. Everyone else makes fun of me for it."
"You just have to prove them wrong," I tell him. "Just telling people that you want to become Hokage isn't going to make them listen. You have to work hard towards your goal and people will notice and begin taking you seriously."
"I do work hard!" Naruto protests.
"You have to do more then just try to get the other villagers to like and pay attention to you. You have to start with yourself first before moving on to your peers."
Naruto cocks his head to the side. "Start with myself? How do I do that?"
"A good first step is to try your very best while you're at the Academy," I explain.
"I try my best everyday! I just don't understand some stuff like arithmetic."
"That's when you get another instructor to help you or go to the library to study," I say.
Naruto scowls at Ruki. "She never helps me when I ask. She just gives me the look everyone in the village gives me and ignores me. Some instructor."
Yeah, she can be a bitch sometime so I see what Naruto is saying. "Why don't I tutor you sometime?" I ask. I know I said I don't want to be too close to him just yet, but I know Naruto is capable of many things if only someone would've helped him out during his Academy years. I know Iruka did, but he didn't enter the picture until Naruto's last two years of school so it was damaged already done for Naruto and he was too far behind to catch up.
"Are you really good at this stuff?" he asks.
I nod. "Yes I am. It is all very easy to me."
Naruto groans and face plants the desk. "How? That's so not fair!" he complains. "All of it looks like gibberish to me! I can't understand any of it!"
I giggle. "That's why I offered to tutor you so you can understand it. I can tutor you anytime you need me to during lunch or free time." Because everyone in my clan has their noses up my ass to allow me any freedom or privacy to assist him before or after class.
Naruto pumps his fist into the air. "That sounds good to me! Extra studying doesn't sound very fun to me, but if it helps me get a step closer to becoming Hokage then I will do it!"
I clasp my hands together. "That's the spirit!"
Naruto shifts his eyes down towards Sasuke. "Now if only you can tutor teme to stop being a moody person."
I scratch the side of my face with my finger. "Heh, I don't think my teaching will work on him," I tease. "Speaking of Sasuke, did you two have fun at the park yesterday."
Naruto rapidly nods his head. "We did! He was actually in a pretty good mood and we played Shinobi, kick the can, and talked for a while as we swung."
Yay! I'm glad they are growing closer! "If you two had a good time yesterday, why is he like that today?"
Naruto leans into my ear to whisper. "Don't say anything, but he gets in bad mood when he's upset with his brother."
I raise my eyebrows in surprise. "What does his brother do to him?"
Naruto shrugs. "I really don't know. But, all I know is that his brother does this stupid thing where he pokes Sasuke's forehead. Still, I don't know why that would put him in a bad mood."
Oh, I get it now. Sasuke does get upset when Itachi pokes his forehead because it is followed by the usual "Sorry Sasuke. I can't right now. Maybe next time" line. He does
that whenever Sasuke wants to do something with Itachi. He really does look up to his older brother so I can see why that puts him in a bad mood.
The next couple of months had its ups and downs. The ups were that I was still getting good marks in class, my tutoring sessions with Naruto are actually working, and he and Sasuke are becoming really good friends. The downs were that my training sessions at home now involve sparring Neji at times and Haruna is getting sick. You would think I would be excited to be sparring with Neji. Wrong. It is just another way to let the Elder and my father compare and increase the tension between the Main and Branch House.
I started to enjoy the sparring sessions at first until everyone realized that Neji is more superior than I am when he totally kicked my ass one day. He didn't hurt me. He was just quicker on his feet, sharper in his attacks, and easily blocked my strikes. While I know Hizashi was amused about the whole situation, Hiashi was furious. He lectured me for a long time about how it is embarrassing for a member of the Branch House to outdo the heiress. That day, I truly understood how the original Hinata felt almost everyday of her life. After that day, my training schedule increased but Neji continues to outpower me.
And, I'm not even mad or annoyed that Neji is better than me. I actually expected it. He isn't called a genius for shits and giggles. He has truly understood the concept of the Gentle Fist at a young age while I'm still grasping it. Now, I'm not a weakling. I'm pretty good for my age when it comes to the Gentle Fist from my father's harsh and atrocious training. It's just that Neji is better than I am and I have accepted that. Clearly, Hiashi can't and I'm starting to emotionally pull away from him for acting so cold to me.
The other main reason why his whole demeanor has changed is because of my mother getting sick. Being a child, nobody has told me any details. From my observations, I just know that her sickness was very sudden and is very deadly because she looks worse everyday. Her skin has grown very pale and a little grey. Her hair is falling out as her nails are growing brittle and she's lost a lot of weight from not eating. The glow in her eyes has faded away and she doesn't smile as much anymore. It's like this illness is draining her life source. She literally looks like death and it terrifies me.
From being sick, she cannot breastfeed or be around Hanabi much to take care of her so that makes the baby in a continuous bad mood. Hanabi is a natural happy baby so for her to be crying all the time is out of character. I think she senses something is wrong with her mother since she, and Hiashi, is hardly ever around and that breaks my heart. That baby needs her parents… And so do I. I don't like coming home from the Academy anymore. I'm always walking into a grave atmosphere. I come home, do my homework, get yelled at by Hiashi as I train, eat dinner alone, play with Hanabi, and try to push all these troubles to the back of my mind as I concentrate on my chakra books. Same routine everyday.
However, that routine changed one night. As I was training with my father, with Neji and Hizashi watching from the sidelines, it was interrupted as a servant ran into the room without permission. "Hiashi-sama!" he cries frantically.
Hiashi narrows his eyes as I stop for a quick water break. "This better be important."
The servant gives my father a sad look. "It's Haruna-sama. S-she dying."
I spit out my water and drop my glass to the ground as it scatters into a million pieces. I feel my heart begin to beat fast as a lump forms in my throat. What did he just say? Hiashi looks at his servant with frightful eyes before pushing past him and sprinting out of the room. I run after him. I follow him down several hallways and into their bedroom. My mother is laying on her bed, with people surrounding her, coughing loudly. Blood spatters into her hand as I close my eyes to avoid the scene. She's dying. My mother can not be dying! I know she wasn't shown in the anime/manga, but I didn't know she dies!
I open my eyes as tears begin to stream down them. I feel a hand rest on my shoulder and look up to see Hizashi giving me a sympathetic look. Neji emerges to my right as he reaches out to grab my hand. I ignore their comfort as I glance up at my father. He's speechless as he pitifully stares at his dying wife. He breaks out of his trance and walks over to her. He bends down by her side and caresses her cheek. She gives him a small smile and whispers something in his ear.
Hiashi gets back up. "Bring me Hanabi-chan. Now!" he barks as a lady scrambles out of the room to retrieve my baby sister. "Hinata-chan. Come over here."
Neji and Hizashi let go of me as I run over to my parents and climb onto the bed. I crawl over to the pillow next to my mother's head to get a better look at her. "A-are you really dying?" I ask, wiping away my tears.
Haruna smoothed down my hair and runs her hand down my face as she gives me her usual bright smile. "Hinata-chan, you know I love you very much, right?" I nod my head. "Good. You need to listen what I am about to tell you since I think you are mature enough to hear it. Yes, I am dying. However, I need you to listen to me and stay strong. Stay strong for your Otou-san, stay strong for Hanabi-chan, and stay strong for the rest of our clan. Especially to Hanabi-chan." As she speaks, the lady comes back in with Hanabi and hands her to my mother, who begins to cradle her. Hanabi quietly looks into her eyes.
"She is going to grow up without a mother in her life and I need you to be there for her and help guide her. Be the best Nee-san any younger sibling will be lucky to have. Always be there for her and take care of her. She's going to look up to you so you must never give her a reason not to. Be kind and gentle to her but teach her how to be strong and independent. She's going to get lonely and confused at times when she sees other people with their mothers and you will be the person who will comfort her and tell her everything's okay." Her lips begin to quiver as tears falls from her eyes.
"Hinata-chan. You need to promise me that you will continue to be a good and obedient child to you father. Continue to succeed at the Academy and I know you are going to grow up to be a strong kunoichi and leader of our clan. Always treat your peers with kindness and respect and always stand up for what you believe in. Don't each too much cinnamon buns and try to get a goodnight's rest for me every once in awhile. I know you hate to sleep." I giggle at her little joke as I hear tears splash onto my clothes.
"Continue being the kind and sweet girl you are. Never change no matter what anybody says to you. I know you are going to do big things one day and know that I will always be watching you and Hanabi-chan. I will always be listening if you need to talk. I will always be by your side when you are having good days and bad. I will still be with you through everything. I will always love you, Hinata-chan." She looks down at Hanabi and kisses her forehead. "And, I will always love you Hanabi-chan. I know you will grow up to be a bright and excited child. You are always so happy and curious about everything. I can't wait to watch you grow up and see how lovely you become. Make sure to always listen to your sister and father and try not to pick up your sister's bad habits of eating sweets and not sleeping. Make sure you do your best at the Academy also and make friends who will support you and have your back. I see you doing great things with your life and can't wait to see what kind of kunoichi you will be."
She looks back at me once more. "Hinata-chan, please take care of everybody and never change. I love you so so much and I will always be watching over you."
I wrap my arms around her neck as she wiggles out a free arm to hug me back. "I love you, too," I sob.
We stay like this for a few minutes before she pulls back and kisses my forehead and smoothed down my hair once more. The lady picks up Hanabi as Hiashi reaches over and lifts me up. The realization officially hit me that this is goodbye and I will never see her again after this. I will never wake up to her breakfast again or hearing her sing in the shower. I will never see her smile again or hear her laugh. I will never be able to tell her about my days and problems anymore or hear her advice. She's never going to kiss me goodnight ever again or tell me she loves me. She will never see me have my first friend. I will never be able to tell her about my first kiss, my first date, my first love, my first promotion, my first mission. She's going to miss Hanabi's first steps, first words, first day of school. She's going to miss a lot of firsts and I will never get to enjoy experiencing those with her. She can't die. I don't want her to die. She's my mother. She isn't suppose to die.
Hiashi hands me over to Hizashi as I wrap my arms around his neck. "Take her to her room and watch over her until I get back," he say before walking back over to Haruna. I guess her dying is affecting him if he's going to let his own brother actually watch me instead of Kō or a nanny.
Hizashi simply nods before taking me to my room with Neji trailing behind him. I continue to sob into Hizashi's shoulder as he lets go of me to put me on the ground but I keep holding onto him. I don't care if he hates me right now. I need a shoulder to cry on, literally and metaphorically, and I just want to feel comforted right now. Hizashi must've sensed this because he allows me to stay in my position as he sits down on my bed. Neji climbs up to join us.
"Your mother is going to a better place now." Hizashi says to me after a few quiet minutes. I keep my head buried into his shoulder, pretending that he didn't make such a cliché comment. "She's not going to feel anymore pain or sorrow. She is going to be set free forever and she will be happier." He prys me off of his shoulder and stares me straight in the eyes. "You need to stay strong like she advised you and not break her promises."
I wipe my tears away and I sigh heavily. "I-I do want to stay strong, but I think I will need some time."
Hizashi gives me a kind smile. "That is understandable. Just remember what she said and never forget it. She loves you very much and is entrusting her will to you to carry on her wishes." I nod as I look away, my chest swelling up with grief. I do not want to speak again in fear of having another sobbing episode.
I make eyes with Neji as he raises his eyebrows in worry while trying to give me a reassuring smile. He grabs ahold of my hand. "Everything will be okay, Hinata-sama," he tells me. "I will always be here for you." Even though his mother died when he was just a baby, I don't think he exactly knows what is going on. He just knows that I'm in pain and he's trying his best to protect me from it.
I give him a thankful smile. "Thank you, Neji-nii-san. I'm going to need you."
The atmosphere at home in the following days were somber. After my mother's private funeral, my father spiraled into depression. He hasn't been eating, sleeping, or socializing much with others. He has cancelled all of my training sessions for the week and has locked himself in his office, ordering his servants and nannies to watch over me and Hanabi. I have requested to have Neji by side whenever he wa a free so I didn't have to spend my time with people I hardly knew or Kō.
My own feelings have been bottled up ever since the day my mother died. After my talk with Hizashi, I realized that I do need to stay strong. Especially since my father's mental state is unfit to take care of his children or clan at the moment. Whenever I am not at school or with Neji, I am spending my time with Hanabi. She's five months old now so she's going to be talking and walking in a few months and needs some proper guidance from someone and I want that person to be me. I've been doing things such as repeating certain words to her, reading books, and showing her different shapes and colors just to let her start recognizing and hearing them. From the anime/manga, I know she becomes intelligent, independent, and gifted and I just want to give her a head start.
I haven't told Naruto what happened to my mother yet. I feel like I shouldn't because his life is already tragic enough and I'm one of the few people he can actually open up to and be himself without feeling any negative emotion. I don't want to give him the burden that he has to make me feel better and worry about me. It might be a stupid reason, but that's just how I feel. I will tell him later when the pain of my mother's death has subsided and I can speak about it without crying.
However, someone from my class did find out about my mother's death and surprised me one morning by approaching me about it. I am sitting alone at my desk when I notice Sasuke passing his and making his way towards me. Naruto isn't here yet and he usually sits by himself either way so I am wondering why he is coming to me. He stands besides my desk and shoves his hands into his pockets. He has an odd look on his face as he seems to be struggling to find the right words to speak.
I decide to initiate the conversation first. "Good morning, Sasuke-kun," I greet. "What's up?"
Sasuke looks slightly startled that I spoke first. "I heard about your mother," he tells me. "I just want to give you my apologies." He softens his features.
Wait, why is Sasuke saying these things? I mean, it is respectful to apologize for someone's loved one's death. But, the kid has never said one word to me. He smirked at my joke towards Naruto a couple of months ago, but that's the only interaction we've ever had and that movement was an indirect one.
"Thank you," I reply politely. He nods before walking off to his seat. I just gaze at his back in confusion. What was that all about?
Author's Note: Sorry this chapter was a little short! The next chapter is going to be longer. But, I hope you all enjoyed it! Thank you for all the follows/favs and reviews! They are all important to me. I'm sorry that I killed off Haruna but I think it was expected. At least her and Naruto are good again, but what's up with Sasuke? Why is he randomly talking to her? Find out next time on Playing the Role of the Byakugan Princess!
….. Sorry, I felt like playing narrator lol.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
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