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38.46% The Sacrifice of the Lamb / Chapter 5: Humans have an amazing capacity

Kapitel 5: Humans have an amazing capacity

Humans have an amazing capacity to believe in contradictory thing. They believe their god is omnipotent and benevolent, but somehow find excuses to all the suffering in the world.- Yuval Noah Harari

Maya sang painfully out of tune: In Time To Catch Your Tears.

"I know you, you won't cry when I walk away. And you know me, I won't turn back and wave. We've been together for some time now and those were some good days under the sun. You took me out dancing, and we drank just enough for the world to start spinning,

But now you think I'm old enough. You said something about a diamond in the rough, so you gave me ticket and said take the long way around the world is better like that.

You said you'll see me soon, you said I'll come close to knowing the real you after I've experienced it all for myself. You throw me a party at the perfect hour and I remember what your last words were:

You said goodbye, without the bye.

You said see you soon without a tear in your eye,

You hugged me one last time and then walked away before I could say: I'll be back before you know it, the trip around the world in eighty seconds or less, but I'll be back in time to catch your first tear before it falls.

We're not lovers nor friends, just a mutual feeling between us. You sent me a text late at night asking me which star I could see. I got up and told you north, you had a smile in your voice as you said me 'me too'.

I felt like then we were closer together, I know that you'll pick me up if I were to call you, but you were the one to wave me off and I think I'm learning something new.

I meant to tell you, that I saw a couple the other day, he looked ridiculous in the same t-shirt she wore, but she just looked so happy.

I want to tell you as friends, we could be making memories down this lane, but you've got a job that takes you everywhere but here; and I'm still growing up…

You said goodbye, goodbye, without the bye, without the bye.

You said see you soon, see you soon, without a tear in your eye, in your eye,

You hugged me one last time, one last time, and then walked away, walked away, before I could say:

I'll be back before you know it, the trip around the world in eighty seconds or less, but I'll be back in time to catch your first tear before it falls.

So, don't cry a river, 'cause it'll wash through my soul a deep feeling of regret,

Remember you're dear to me, almost like a sister, remember you're dear almost like a sister. And if you feel like the heavens might burst just hold it for a little longer because…

I'll be back before you know it, the trip around the world in eighty seconds or less, but I'll be back in time to catch your first tear before it falls.

"What do you think the song means?" I ask Maya.

"Rosealinde is talking about when younger siblings watch older siblings leave; it's a reflection of her past life. And vice versa"

We lay on Maya's bed; her bedroom was strangely modern for Rosealinde. The door was oak, but other doors in her room were made out of coloured glass. She had no windows, but the ceiling was pure glass, her bed was big and red and she had a floor to ceiling wardrobe. She then had things like TVs and a white box called Xbox and WII, which she had just recently taught me how to play.

"It's sad leaving." I say quietly staring at her ceiling.

"Mmmhh." She hums, probably in agreement.

"Does Rosealinde give you an allowance?" She ask suddenly. I frown, I sit up. Then I lay back down.

"I would know right?" I ask her.

"Not really, Rosealinde gave me a credit card and told me I had been receiving twenty gold pieces every time I did something right."

"So how much did you have?"

"Mmm… not a lot. But the price of gold is high; so currently I'm set for a middle comfortable life in Spain. Because I like the idea of Spanish guys whispering: bonita!"

"I thought you had a crush on the singer Lefty." I remind her.

"Yeh, but he's a singer."

I laugh, I guess that was true, actors, singers, celebrities in general… there was no hope if you really liked one to be able to meet them let alone have enough time to fling yourself at them and hope they catch you.

My days at Rosealinde's mansion/palace/resort were numbered; well not like I was going to leave in ten days or anything… I would be leaving in three months' time. Maya however, was leaving the day we celebrated, she told me her favourite food was Chinese. She told me a lot about herself, more then I cared to know or than I asked for. Honestly Maya and I hadn't spent much time together, Rosealinde had trained us separately, only pairing us when she wanted to show us the same technique to then use on each other. To only beat us with a different technique all together, when she fought us.

I learnt that Maya had been with Rosealinde, on and off whatever that meant, for nearly seventy-five years. She told me of the time she was in India, in the slums, where she had been born to one vampire and one human couple. It had been a dry summer and their shelter had burnt down, because they had made it out of bush stuff, seriously how stupid had her parent been? Too hot summer and dry sticks was a disaster just waiting to happen. She then told me too much in detail of her twenty years struggling to fit in, occasionally killing her friends who would find out that she was a lamina, complaining she had found it hard to fit in. Then of some strange sensei who lived in India, he had taken this 'young Laminia' under his wing, that was the kind of Vampire Maya was. I don't think she realised I didn't know the difference. She then told me of a tranquil training that only lasted another twenty years before the Vampire built himself a greenhouse and walked into it one day, his stupidity must have rubbed off on her she wasn't too bright either, seriously if you know you'll die of the sun, why would you get a greenhouse built? Then she had wondered aimlessly for three years 'searching for a purpose' then Rosealinde claimed her as 'hers', I know, it was starting to sound strangely like a love story to me as well, and they 'lived happily ever after'. I added the ending after Maya's actual ending made no sense.

No more sense than her claiming she had spent seventy-five years with Rosealinde, when it was only twelve years ago she had been a princess ridding in a carriage and waving. Maya had muttered something about 'time travel', which made even less sense; we weren't in Doctor Who, things like time travel just didn't happen. But then again, not long ago I wouldn't have believed in magic, vampires or the general existence of mythological creatures. Like in the Mythological world, vampires –Laminias (which was the kind of vampire both Maya and Rosealinde had been (in Maya's case still was), a vampire that had been born from vampire parents, making them the strongest type of vampire possible)- were unable to resuscitate after being killed; hence why Rosealinde had quickly isolated herself from that world, because even in their world, the impossible wasn't a possibility, there was a line that wasn't ever crossed and Rosealinde having crossed that line, hadn't returned to that world. This is why she operated in the shadows, although I wasn't sure what Rosealinde had become, from some rumours circulating around her 'The Don' persona, it was rumoured that it (Rosealinde) was half demon half faye (fay as in fairie). Which sounded both terrifying as well as alluring, but at the end of the day rumours were just voices in the wind.

"You ready?" I look up from the breakfast table, it now consisted of only me and Rosealinde. Russo had gone back with Maya, something inside me missed his warm presence, too much time alone with Rosealinde made you depressed or at least feel like she was shifting the weight off her shoulders onto yours; and I never had expressed any kind of want or need to 'have a day in her shoes. To be Rosealinde must be a tough job, she was a member of the council of nine (rumours were they were gods who decided everything… I don't know what they really did, she never divulged any information); she was the infamous 'The Don', she also was a 'Shadow Person' and she was a singer in a band, the latter being probably her most fun role. But still, Rosealinde had to be everything and everyone… I would never want that kind of responsibility… I wonder if she has ever abused it?

I look at her puzzled, I hadn't been told I was going anywhere. Rosealinde, though looked like she had no time for me, she gets out of her chair (which may I say was more of a throne than normal chair, the rest of them were not as opulent and decorated; figures. She gets the best chair).

"Stop being petty, Jesus Christ! Get a move on, you're late." She leaves the room glaring behind at me. Then her hat went over her head, and I could only see the brim.

I leap up terrified.

When was she going to stop doing this to my poor fragile heart? She always would give me that look if I forgot something or did something wrong, however I was convinced I was doing well. Two weeks since Maya had left Rosealinde seemed to have become even more closed and taciturn.

"…You're going to be meeting someone of average importance." She was speaking before I was in earshot so I was glad I had chosen to run after her. I skidded to a halt.

"Do you continue talking even when no one is around to listen."

"You should've been behind me." I roll my eyes at her curt answer.

"So, who's more important than you?" I ask sarcastically, her hand twitches, her gloved fingers curl tighter around the head of the walking stick.

The silver skull with roses and thorn crossbones had real eye, these he used to roll at me. Her collection of walking sticks both repelled me as they fascinated me, some were absolutely absurd, that someone like Rosealinde having one was complete unimaginable. Apparently, Maya had brought her one with a dog which licks the owner's hand every time too much pressure is applied; Rosealinde had shown me it with a small smile. So, I'm guessing that Maya brought her walking sticks, seventy-five years did provide a girl a lot of Christmas and birthdays to fill.

"Jillian Sleuth." I frown, I had never heard of this Jillian Sleuth character, so why was she practically running.

"He doesn't sound very nice." I say.

"He isn't however, he is someone rather important and he will manage you when I am not around."

"You know when you say manage it's just another way of saying control right?" I say shuffling my feet.

"In this world, Zoe, the weak are the easiest kill." She says my name rather pointedly, and I disliked it.

Sure I wasn't the strongest sweet in the sweetshop, but I was definitely likeable… more than Rosealinde, probably shouldn't use her as an example to being likeable.

"Bright ray of sunshine, aren't you today?" She gives me another dark look, the brim of her hat shields me from it, though, so it wasn't as scary as usual.

We walk to Rosealinde's garage, which was underground, so as to fit in all the cars she had. Rosealinde had the biggest car collection I had ever seen, a car museum would be jealous. She had the first car probably ever made, then she had fast cars and old makes of limited editions. Out of all these: Mercedes, Jaguars, Aston Martens, Bentley, Audis and goodness knows what else, she also had limos and super-mega-huge jets and yachts (Maya had told me about the yachts, they couldn't fit in the sky). Again, how she had earned this in twelve years was puzzling, maybe time travel was the answer.

Her favourite was a pure gold car, something that didn't look as gaudy as it sounded. It looked like a gold statue, until you opened it and saw the leather interior and wooden steering wheel. She also had had it custom made in Italy. Rosealinde liked the best out of life. I climbed in, she had never taken me out. This was going to be interesting.

Rosealinde, presses a button on her walking stick's head, I watch as the dark garage is filled with sun light. Rosealinde gets in behind the steering wheel, it was hard to tell when we were moving, because it went so fast. All that registered to me was driving into an endless portal. Rosealinde had taught me about portals and vortexes and other dimensions that existed. When I say taught, I mean she had spoken great lengths about her experiences with them.

Then she had walked out saying 'class dismissed'. It had been very general, she explained there were three realities: past, present and future. Then there were periods: which depended on the civilisation living at the time. And then there were moot points in history that were not to be altered unless you had permission from her and the king. Which also had secondary and tertiary settings: events that you could change without drastically changing the future you could be living in. It made me think, I would never time travel unless an expert was with me.

We drove in the dark vortex (vortexes were other dimension portals that lapsed within the different galaxies) driving further and further away from my home: earth.

"Stop being so dramatic." Says Rosealinde, she suddenly hands me a pair of glasses.

"Wear these, the light will hurt your eyes." I put them on, just as we pulled up to a big brick run down wall. Well, that was disappointing. I imagined lasers, and neon glow-y things.

"Again, stop being dramatic." She breaks five millimetres away from it, the bumper nearly touched it. I breath a sigh of relief, note to self: wear a blindfold when Rosealinde takes you out driving.

To my joy the wall moves and starts transforming. Finally something alien-like.

"OMG!!! Cool, it's like Hulk! No, the guy off 'The Fantastic Four' who's made of bricks, what's he called… he's that!" I tug at her sleeve, her irritated expression doesn't kill my happiness, instead it fuels it. I sit back grinning widely, trying to remember the names of the superheroes. Rosealinde was probably regretting, allowing movie marathon weekend: where Maya and I stayed up two days watching superhero films!!!

"Please behave."

She presses her foot down and touches her brim as we zoom past the wall -man, I turn back in time to see him lie back in the middle of the road…cool.

"When you meet Jillian, don't look directly into his eyes. Also remember to say: 'sathia meehkana cho- ri xciao' and don't touch-"

"Wait, wait, wait. Is that Alien for 'hello, how are you'?" This was soo cool, so this was where she came from??? Awesome… well… I actually couldn't see… but I bet it'll be awesome!!!!

"No it's alien for : please don't suck my brain out." I look at her horrified. What! Aliens' sucked brains? Since when?

"Oh no, that's zombies." She suddenly says quietly. Seriously, she forgot who sucked brains? Also, it alerted me to the fact she could be joking… slightly. I still was unsure.

"Or do they eat brains, and aliens suck them?" She starts muttering quietly, musing to herself; it wasn't helping my nerves.

"Ugh, back to the 'sathia mekhana cho-ri ciao' thingy-"

"Wrong. It's 'sathia meehkana cho- ri xciao'. Meehkana, mee, not me. And xciao not ciao."

"Ah, it's soo hard!"

"You think English isn't hard?" I gruffly turn away, but then I notice she was getting out. I quickly smooth down my jeans and jeans jacket. I tighten my laces then I step out.

I gasp as I look around, shrinking back: big black marble columns with different animals and reptiles gliding around and up or down surround an atrium.

In the centre was a big white marble fountain with black leaf decoration, and melted gold spilled out from all sides.

I could see the entrance to a very vast room with big portraits of every shadow person, Shadow Person didn't seem to be a race or a type of Mythological Creature, so much as a general title for people like Rosealinde like when Rosealinde explained to me the title of Lord amongst Mythological people. It's a title that meant supreme, the strongest, Lord meant the strongest in the world, for example Lord Emrys was the strongest Warlock on earth, meanwhile Rosealinde was a Shadow Person, she was the strongest being in the universe. Although, I had never experienced Lord Emrys, he was a legend that was prominent in human stories as well as Mythological ones, however the Shadow People are never mentioned… strange. On one side of the atrium there was visible a line of big gondolas that glided along in the molten gold river and in the other was a pure black marble garden.

A big black marble tree with a golden swing and snow like leaves, flowers mostly gold, black, deep purple, deep blue, deep green, deep red and deep pink, they all had in the middle gem stones or a heavily scented perfume in a bottle.

"They cure the rarest diseases." Rosealinde says, she was leaning against the car smoking, only there was no smoke or smell… this place was soo cool!!! I sound like some dimwit teenager, I need to stop using such words… maybe I should adopt Rosealinde's pompous language.

Other trees scattered the enchanting, yet scary garden, there was a walkway with gold paved stones. And a gazebo made out of, please don't tell me that was bones (I secretly loved it!) . I inch towards the golden river; I walk through several wondering spirits while doing so, this sent shivers down my spine. I looked down at the polished marble and realised it reflected a sky above me that seemed to be filled with golden light, I shade my eyes and squint upwards wondering whether it was heaven.

"Where are we? And what are the spirits…" I trail off unsure how to phrase my question.

"This is dimension 0, reality: none and period… nothing." She says walking over, those wondering spirits are exactly that… wondering spirits."

"So there is no time down –or is it up, here?"

"No time no, as for its orientation it's more or less the closest place to hell without being hell, so I guess it's down."

"And period, means again…"

"No time, means no event is important because it doesn't affect the time line this place revolves around."

My head was bursting with the information she was throwing at me.

"So by dimension 0 you mean…" I ask looking at her.

"It's not limbo, if that's the conclusion you have come to. It's… the control… room/ centre. Whatever allows you to sleep at night."

"What… do… you… mean… by control… room?"

Rosealinde was guiding me to a gondola as I spoke. As we guided down the golden river, we passed portraits and more people that resembled Rosealinde, the big eyes and alien perfection thing, they had that in common, they didn't look like her. We stopped at her portrait, it swung open revealing a rather normal setting. There was a secretary at the front desk and people wearing 'The Don' rosaries rushed about. They all stopped to bow as we walked past.

We arrived at a room, Rosealinde presses her hands against the cool slab of marble it and it swung open. It was massive, but what it held made me want to run out. Control room, people sat playing chess with real people, and animals. From the ceiling, hanging by their necks were more people. I turn to look at her. There was no light in the room, only the light from the living heartbeats, I watched sickened as someone placed their hands over a child on a street, the light dims and then fades completely. Then I watch as it rises to join the people on the ceiling.

"Life is a game. Ever heard of that saying?"

"You..." I say numbly, I realised there was no place for sitting, the things working here could float, from board to board. Deciding... Other people's lives… playing with them. Like toys. Or dolls.

"We do our best." She leads me out, I was surrounded by some people. They gave me tea and a piece of cake. I throw it at them.

Rosealinde, starts shoving past her own people who seemed concerned about my health… mentally I was scarred. We got on another gondola.

I arrive at a different portrait, she doesn't allow me to look at it, she throws me in and then follows suit, she fixes herself.

"Stop looking like you've met the devil." I turn to look at her, I was ready to yell at her. But something in the corner of my eye moves, I spin around.

A man, tall and long unfolded his long limbs, which he then shortens to a human 'normal' size. His bleached white hair was nearly gelled into a Mohawk, his eyes were violet and his nose was strangely small. He wasn't as attractive as Rosealinde, he was more leaning toward the 'alien' side and less 'human' look.

"Jillian Sleuth." He says looking down at me. His voice shocked me, his face didn't support the baritone voice that came out of his lips. I then remembered what I was supposed to say in his presence. I drop into a curtsy and say:

"Sathia meehkana cho- ri xciao" There was an awkward silence where he looked very mystified and Rosealinde's smile was out of place… she had been bluffing!!!! I had known it, it was strange how she had rambled on about aliens and zombies thing.

"Ugh… I'm sorry to inform you that whatever Rosealinde taught you, it's doesn't mean anything."

I feel myself blushing, I turn outraged, to glare at Rosealinde only to find she was gone.

"Don't mind her." He says, I turn to face him.

Jillian… Sleuth… there was something unsettling about him. It was strange, sure he was politer than Rosealinde and at first meeting he seemed nice enough as well… but there was something… just out of reach but I could sense it.

"Where did she go?" I ask him.

He shrugs and leaves the room, and that was when I decided I didn't really like him. Rosealinde had always told me not to leave your own room empty while a stranger was in it. I waste no time in sifting through his things. Something in me told me that Rosealinde was lying about several things, especially when she had previously told me that Russo was managing me while she wasn't around. Maybe she was already giving me little jobs to do… for instance spy on this weird thing with the excuse of him managing me… yeh that sounded twisted enough to be one of Rosealinde's plans.

I find strange documents, with the Royal seal. I took pictures of these with my new phone and their contents, I wasn't good with the new technology but I knew how to take pictures. I found pictures of a girl, I turned this around wondering if it was important. Then I pick it up and placed it on my phone. I watched it scan the image. I feel something in my pocket, it was very heavy… strange. I hadn't put anything in my pocket before leaving… ah maybe Rosealinde had transported it. I put the phone down and then I pull out a strange black bottle with a label, Rosealinde's handwriting covered it: spray this on everything you've touched.

I don't risk spraying it on only the things I had touched, I spray the whole room. I watch as gold dust lands on various places… probably where I had touched things, and they shimmer for a bit before disappearing.

Something I was becoming aware of was my new ability to sense things, not like a gut feeling more like someone probing my stomach. I quickly hope that whatever the phone had been scanning on the picture was done. I place it back in the draw I had found it, then I try remembering where I was standing.

Jillian walks back in carrying a tray of goodies, it nearly made me feel bad for snooping around, nearly… not enough to tell him. He smiles, and pours something that looked like green tea. He folds himself onto a chair, his long insect- like body creeping me out again.

"You must have so many questions for me." He says smiling kindly.

Like a wolf wrapped in sheep's clothing… his violet eyes however looked menacing.

"Ughh – think, all the questions you've wanted to ask Rosealinde!- What are you guys?"

I try to act casual as I sipped the drink.

"We are nor here nor there, Rosealinde explained it to you no? That it's a title, the whole 'Shadow People' thing, we are the most powerful people in this universe, but we're not people, we are entities, beings, magic embodiment. Granted there aren't many of us, mainly because they got wiped out…" He pauses, he unlike Rosealinde was more human in his habits, he waved his hands around, his eyebrows danced on his forehead when he was speaking.

During his break he sipped his tea, smiled as if it was the most refreshing thing her had tasted, and leanes back inhaling deeply. Feeling a bit rude, I sip the tea… tea wasn't my thing, I had never understood this strange hot water with leaves drink that people kept offering me, and I still don't. But Jillian was so nice and now I felt really bad about the snooping, but its what Rosealinde wanted… her wish was my command.

"Rosealinde though decided it best to remove our planet, our galaxy creates entities like us. And we couldn't risk a secret revolt. Also, because we-"

"- wait… wait, wait. By 'remove' you mean it no longer exists?" I gape at him.

"You're not very smart for a Shadow Keeper in training. That is what your people call themselves. Anyone who works for a Shadow Person keeps the secret, hence the name: Shadow Keeper. Though… I'm not sure what secret they are keeping, Rosealinde just feels it's appropriate to not tell any of the earthlings of our exsistance and our hold over them, it might thoroughly disturb you. That's what she says, I disagree, I feel humans should know, so they can live their one lives to the fullest " Why was everyone like Rosealinde obsessed with my intelligence? Is that how they measured people in the control room? Also, I agreed with Jillian, us 'earthlings' we weren't pawns, we had the right to know what was going on.

"We do not measure people based on intelligence, Zoe." He says patronizingly. Ah... he could read my mind as well.

"Everyone here can read your mind Zoe; anyway people are measured by their value."

I choke: "by their money?"

"No, imbecile. Their donation to the world. What they can do to improve it. This is Rosealinde and mine's …policy. A better world will make a better universe. You guys are the examples. It's hard to explain everything."

He waves his arms around as if it could help me understand more what he was talking about. This made me smile, he smiles back and I was slightly scared of his pointy teeth, all of them were sharp and pointy, I knew for a fact Rosealinde had quite normal looking teeth, only her canines were above average pointy, but it added to her sex appeal…strangely.

"Any other questions?" He asks.

"How is Rosealinde older than eighteen? She was six when I killed her and twelve years later she isn't the age she should be."

"She always resurrects herself to be in her mid-twenties, it's a convenient age. Plus, I believe her vanity may play a fair part in it."

He answers smiling.

"Anything else?"

"Nah, I'm good thank you. Umm… good day Jillian."

I stood up, he stands up and opens his portrait, he helped me out and I smiled at him again.

"Whenever Rosealinde gets too much, or you need someone who will answer questions… anything. Let me know." He gives me a coin, the coin has seven dots on it. Before I leave he leaves me a message in my mind. Don't tell Rosealinde, let's keep it between you and me okay?!" When I turn back to confirm he was smiling waving like a child. Looks like its only Rosealinde who had problem emoting, not her entire race.


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