Kapitel 19: Fear
There would be a point in everyone's life where we have to do or to start something new. To jump into a new environment. A new life. It was definitely something scary and nerves wrecking. Adjusting ourselves to something so foreign, it consumes so much energy and time. And that was what I was facing at that moment. Sometimes I grew tired of it, and of life in general. More than once I found myself questioning 'why do I have to do all these!? Why do I have to work? And then why do I have to spend what I have earned? What's the point of that? Where is this going to take me to?'
But deep in my heart, I knew all the answers to the questions already. And to be quite honest, I also knew it that if something scared me irrelevantly, that only means that I have to get over it, or to conquer the feeling and just get the job DONE.
"What are you scared of, actually?" Asked Ally when we were having a breakfast together with Gina at the Dr. Love.
"So many! Dealing with the seniors...new work tasks...ugh many more!"
" Well, I think that's a normal feeling for anyone who is about to start a new job at a new place. Give it a week or two and you'll blend like this coffee!"
" I don't know...I'm scared if I don't meet their expectation on me."
" Oh you mean you are scared that they would only want the best from you?"
" But why must that scares you? Any employers would of course want their workers to give their best at work."
"Ugh I don't know. I'm just so nervous thinking about all this!
But all these chickening around however did not stop me from saying "Yes" to them when they offered me the job at Hey.
Chan, the one who called me for the interview the other day called me again to break the happy news to me and I would be required to report for duty on the next Tuesday in a smart casual dressing.
*****
Right on the day and time I was required of, I showed up at the Terry Lee Publication. I woke up as early as five, feeling so fiery to start this new chapter. I even bought a red hot coloured outfit special for the day, to match my blazing excitement. I met with Chan, soon as I got there. After signing down some important documents and briefed about the protocols, the eligibles, salary and such, I was brought to the editorial section of the magazine, or just 'Editorial' as Chan and everybody else would call it. I was introduced to everyone in the Editorial including Rushdee, Teresa and Dee. According to Chan, they were bearing among the most important roles in Hey. They were very talented and their ideas were never taken off for granted by the editor in chief or by the Terry Lee's operational team itself. Then I was brought to meet Carmen and Susan, who interviewed me the other day. They looked quite happy when they saw me coming in there and wished me good luck and that I would be happy working with the magazine.
After all of these introductions, I was finally brought to the place where I was going to spend the most of my time there- my work desk. It's situated just right next to the entrance of the Editorial, and that got me thinking that I might also probably serve as the unofficial receptionist for the department, other than my official title. My table was in good size, and was covered with a thick black paper. However there were some Emily The Strange stickers still on it and as if that's not weird enough, there were also a few pictures of some black cats. Scary much! Part of me just wanted to find out about the previous 'mysterious' owner of the table, but no...I did not wanna be seen as someone nosy or choosy on my first day of working so I just bit my tongue instead.
"So...Marina, here's your table, your workplace. Do whatever you want with it." Said Chan.
"Can I get rid of these stickers, Chan?"
"Oh by all means! Some flowers also would be nice!" Chan laughed as she walked away.
Just as she disappeared, there were these three ladies coming to my table. They were all looking equally petite and I was wondering who they were, as I did not see them when Chan was showing and introducing me around. I could not take my eyes of them honestly, because they looked absolutely flamboyant and their outfits were such an attention grabber. Each one of them was wearing a different colour. Yellow, green and red and they looked perfectly styled from top to toe.
"Name?" Asked the one in yellow.
"I'm Marina. Yours?" I replied, trying to look at all three of them at once.
"Ours?" They were looking into each other and laughed.
"We are The Urban Fruits!" All answered in the same time, like it's been rehearsed for days.
"The Urban Fruits?" I asked back, vaguely.
"Yup! I'm Miss Banana, this is Miss Durian, and this is Miss Rambutan." The one in yellow outfit introduced themselves one by one.
"Oh wow! So does everyone here call you guys Banana, Durian, and Rambutan?"
"Yes! But don't mess yourself up! Just call us Miss B, Miss D and Miss R"
"Oh. Okay! Cute! So cute!" I complimented them.
I had a brief conversation with them and turned out they were very kind and easy going. I could feel it that we would make a good team there in Hey. However as a newcomer, I never stopped reminding myself to always watch my back, my mouth and my act. It's barely one day of me being there and it's just too soon to judge and conclude anything, or even more to let my guards down.
Harry who had to work outside that day managed to stop by and check me out. But he did not make it to the office. We met shortly at the Capital Square. At that point I have met almost everyone from the office. But only one person left- Daniel. The infamous editor in chief of Hey Magazine.
"I wonder where Daniel is. I haven't met him at all." My question to Harry who's been enjoying his lunch.
"He had to work outside today. He'll be back soon don't worry."
"I see. I didn't expect it that he's very hardly to be seen around. I did not even see him during the interview."
"Well...here's a thing. After you got to meet him soon, just be careful okay. It's best to keep a distance." That sounded like a warning.
"Why is that?
"He's full of mystery and so dangerous!" Harry was being dramatic. But the smile on that face obviously telling me it's a joke.
"Mysterious? Dangerous? Does he eat people or what? You're funny!" I laughed.
"You think I'm kidding around? See it for yourself. Just don't say I didn't warn you alright!" Added Harry.
"Yea right..."
*****
Days gone by, and I was starting to get comfortable with my job as an office girl there. Documents after documents went through my table and slowly I learned from them and from everyone in the office. And when I was stuck, Google would help me find a way out. It turned out that the role as an office girl at the magazine was bigger than I expected. It's far from all those office works I saw in Nona Silk. Maybe the different focus of them two created a huge dissimilarities in an office girl's job in both industries. The responsibilities, the job scopes, and the challenges, it's just different! However I liked what I was doing and I was so thrilled that I got to experience them all.
"On the first Friday working with the company, Rani asked me to accompany her to the Amcorp Mall. She called me a couple hours before I clock out and told me that she wanted to buy some sewing needs. I said yes to her and once I was done with work, we went straight to that mall. I helped her to choose all that she needed. Rani told me that she was sewing a curtain set for the office- as a token of remembrance before she moved to TNS Kuching soon
"I never thought you would go to Kuching at all!" I said to her, in such a melancholic sound. We sat for a while in one of the benches in the nearby park, after she found what she's looking for.
"It's all for a new experience, girl..."
"I don't know when we will meet each other again..."
"Oh come on girl...Kuching and KL is just a one hour 30 minutes flight away! Do U think I'm going to stay there forever? Comes Deepavali I'll be right here in KL for sure! And that doesn't count any other holidays. KL is my kampung man...I'll be back, eventually."
"Hmm that's right. I was so dramatic!"
"Not surprised! Oh by the way...Have you met the editor in chief? What's his name again? Daniel right?" Asked Rani.
"Not yet! Harry told me they're now in Jakarta for a shoot."
"Daniel took Harry with him?"
"Yeah.. Harry once told me that Daniel always take him together anywhere as he trusts Harry's eyes and opinion."
"That means whoever Harry is seeing must compete with Daniel for his attention it seems." Said Rani. I knew she just wanted to see how I'd react to that.
"Maybe." I replied short and unshaken.
"How are the people at the new office Marina...Are they treating you good?"
"Well so far so good. Hopefully it stays like that forever."
"Ah I don't think it's going to be like that always. An office without a drama is just a myth! You just wait and see Marina..."
"Hush! You made me even more nervous!"
"Hahahaha I was just testing you!" Rani laughed.
"Why are you nervous Marina? What is it that makes you nervous like this?
"I don't know...maybe due to the fact that I have to restart and relearn everything from the scratch again. And that makes me worried and scared a little bit." I confessed to Rani.
"I think this is going to be a really good start, Marina. A really good one." Rani said to me in such a positive tone.
"Yeah I hope so..."
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein