Kapitel 177: Facing my guilt
What Giselle saw in front of her was something that triggered the past. Dark visions from that day visited her. Her mind clouded with images of her dress getting torn apart as Mike almost had his way with Giselle.
All those dark past hit her, without realizing, Giselle's leg started to move. She flipped and turned as fast as she could and started running.
She ran and ran.
Her breath became abnormal as she panted hard. All that went in her mind was to run; run away from the guy who could hurt her.
Giselle did not care for the direction she went, and so when her energy dropped, and she stopped, she found herself back inside the campus.
Giselle found herself struggling to breathe. She squatted on her knees and began controlling her puffs.
After calming down, she raised her head and looked around.
'I came back to school.'
'-but, why?'
She wondered.
It is then she realized that after encountering Mike, Giselle did not know what to do, and so, naturally she sought out towards Lillian Grey, who is present at the school.
Without a second thought, her body moved towards its direction.
Now that Giselle realized, her eyes immediately searched for Lillian Grey.
Everywhere she looked, she couldn't find the one person she is longing to see.
Minutes passed when Giselle had to give up, but just as she consoled herself from not seeing Lillian, Giselle heard a familiar voice crawling from behind her.
It was from Mike.
He followed her back to the school.
Frightened from his presence once again, Giselle jerked up from her position. She removed her bag and held it to her chest as a defensive shield of protection.
"Giselle, wait-" Mike replied fast, his tone moderately pitched as if he did not want to scare her off.
Giselle stepped back even though she heard it. Every hair on her body stood up in terror. Although Mike is not here to hurt Giselle, her instincts told her to be on alert.
Seeing her frightened face, Mike spoke once again. But this time, he used a more cautious tone.
"I'm not here to hurt you. I only wanted to talk, please, Giselle, give me just five minutes."
Seeing Mike beg, Giselle didn't nod or agree yet glued to her feet she waited, her eyes quivering worriedly.
Only after a few seconds of carefully observing Mike did Giselle agreed with a slight nod. Regardless, she did not loosen her guard and sustained a distance with Mike; her heart still beating over the top as if it could explode from the tremble.
Mike breathed under relief, unknowingly he took two tiny steps towards the shivering girl. Giselle retracted twice the distance he took. Mike paused, seeing how alarmed she is, the guy's heart wrenched in pain.
"I won't move- I won't-" he promised.
Giselle's brows released and with eyes full of resentment, she waited despite not wanting to listen to this guys, she waited for what Mike wants to talk.
…
"How should I start?" Mike brushed the back of his head.
"I- Back then-" Mike stammered with every word.
***
Bounded by his sin, Mike lived the past days of his life in guilt. Whatever he did, he felt no peace and every night, clouded by the recurring nightmare.
After the incident with Lillian Grey, he somewhat appeared free from being haunted by his mistakes yet, the fact that he did not apologize for his crime inflicted another round of blazing pain in his mind. It all turned him into a mess.
Mike knew what he did is unjustifiable. However, at least by confessing his mistake to Giselle might free him from his madness.
At first, he wanted to use the trip to apologize to Giselle. But, the timings never worked for him. He was not able to meet Giselle.
Upon returning, he thought tried the past days to meet Giselle yet his plan failed. Every time he neared Giselle, Lillian Grey would be present by her side. Mike did not want to provoke the girl once again. So, he waited patiently.
Yesterday, to his luck, Giselle went home alone, but Mike's luck ran out when he saw the trio with Giselle outside the school. He didn't get that chance either.
Seth's announcement of Lillian Grey after class spread like wildfire. Everyone knows how scary Mr. Seth can be, and so, the fact that Lillian Grey got summoned by him became a gossip for all to talk and share during lunch.
It is how Mike learned about how Lillian Grey would not be there with Giselle after school. Today, finally, he can talk to her without any interference.
***
"Just say what you have to say, I don't want to be anywhere around you," Giselle snapped after Mike's faltering.
Scared for the first time seeing Giselle put on such an angry face, Mike obeyed like a slave.
"I- back at the trip, I met Lillian Grey by chance and things went off hands," Mike started, this time he did not want to stammer.
"I know," Giselle intervened.
"It wasn't enough for a guy who wanted to abuse in the name of love."
Her remarks pierced Mike by a sharp knife. His brows creased in shame of himself.
...
"I'm sorry."
Mike finally said the words he wanted to convey to Giselle.
"I know what I did is detesting. I feel ashamed of myself. However, I still wanted to meet you and apologize."
"It was never my intention to hurt you like that from the beginning. I- Bridgette- I got influenced by and did this unforgivable sin. It's okay if you don't forgive me; still, I want to say sorry."
"Giselle, I always liked you from the moment I met. I wanted to fall in love with you, ask you out, and go on dates. I started building this secret dream of mine, and I only preferred to abide by it. I never thought of reality. Probably that is what caused me to go such extreme to make you mine."
"I swear to god that I did not know anything about you before that. Only after the broadcast, did I learn the truth. My actions were wrong and completely unacceptable."
"I will never disturb you or near you from now on. And I only wanted to sincerely apologies."
"I'm sorry for my mistakes, Giselle."
"I'm sorry," Mike ended his talk.
He poured out all he wanted to say.
Giselle only moved after sensing that his talk ended and that it became silent.
She released her guard and stood straight in front of Mike, still maintaining the distance.
"I'm not going to feel sorry for you, Mike."
Giselle responded finally.
Her words once again threw Mike to the hell. His heart sank deep down.
"But, you did confess your mistakes, I will never forgive you. No matter what anyone says, you should have kept a discipline. I was never your friend or a girlfriend. How can you expect me to be that casual with your behavior?"
Giselle expressed her feelings too.
"I'm okay now because I have someone with me, who cares deeply about me. That is all enough. I don't ever want to see you again."
Giselle broke out loud. Her face relaxed at last.
"Let's not, even by chance, see each other for the rest of our lives, Mike."
After the declaration, she wanted to leave right away but, noticing the guy in despair even after hearing her response, Giselle paused for a moment.
"..."
"I wish you learn from this mistake and please, never hurt a woman just because you love her or care for her."
"It is not the right way to someone's heart."
Giselle spoke silently. Her voice, though at first trembled it eventually settled firmly.
Mike already expected, to not be forgiven still he went. The fact that he confessed his mistake did not bring him peace, but he got relieved from his guilt. Not entirely, but the feeling of guilt faded slowly. Without continuing further, Mike left the place after saying his final goodbye to Giselle.
***
From afar, Lillian Grey watched these two with a solemn expression on her face.
AUTORENGEDANKEN 
ljack_ace
ljack_ace So, I went to the doctor and got tablets for three days!!!
THREE FREaking days!
Another few days with the cold.
I'm starting to grow mushrooms during this sickation.
**Sickation= Sick vacation.
Anyways, stay warm and take care!
I am reading your comments and will reply soon. Also, thank you very much for all your love & support, I will keep working hard.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
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