I felt shit because of that.
It was almost like a lot of weight got off my chest, and yet, the more I thought about it, the shittier I felt. Den was missing, possibly dead. Mom along with him, given how they were together.
And yet, here I was, feeling better about not leaving right now without a plan. All my fucking existence was an excuse at this point.
I heard Den's ship sank, and I decided to just head to the port. That was stupid. Yet, a lot of people gave me their blessing. They were ok with me taking charge of my life and dictating my own destiny. They had faith in me.
However, I, myself didn't know what to do and thus, was easily influenced. Yet, I did agree with Barack Senior. Me rushing to the demon continent without even knowing their language was stupid. Besides, if Den was lost at sea, what the fuck would going to the demon continent do?
Instead, I need to find islands near that route.
If Den was in any known places, the mailing company would have found him. Meaning, he was at some place that didn't have humans. Possibly an island at sea.
And I had to find that island, plot a course, gather up enough funds for a rescue mission and… yup, Barack Senior was right.
Even if it means being a coward. Even if it means being a fucking weasel.
Let's do this!
I picked myself up, wiped my tears, patted some of the kids on their heads and left. I went straight into the dormitory, threw my bag back onto my bed and headed into the library.
"You're back?" The librarian said, a little displeased.
"I changed my mind. I'm going to research first about islands, and then leave; oh and please teach me demon tongue." I didn't give the book back, but I did give the money back.
She rolled her eyes. "Just don't forget your duties."
"Of course!"
.
..
…
Gerar was doing something at the end of the hallway. Instead of being in his room he was staring out into the city.
"Back so soon?" He said.
Alone. He seemed distant- more than usual.
"Yeah. Figured me rushing there without a plan was only going to make things worse."
"Good."
We didn't have much to talk about. We never really talked much anyway. All we did was smalltalk and right now that didn't feel like the right thing. I was distracting myself, and I'm sure he was too.
Yet…
It was kind of calming.
He didn't have caring parents. Or maybe he used to. But now his family wanted him dead. Meanwhile, my parents were missing and there was a chance they were dead. Vastly different situations yet… it almost felt like we could feel each other's pain. Or maybe I was just thinking too much.
"You should head over to the nurse's office."
"Why?"
"Miss Chamille collapsed earlier. She'd probably feel better if you went there."
"Huh… okay."
I dropped off some of my other things and just like Gerar asked, went over to the nurse's office. The nurse was tending Miss Chamille, or more like they were just talking to each other about something.
"Forgot something?" Miss Chamille said. She was lying down on the bed, resting against the wall with a pillow acting as support.
"Plan. I forgot a plan."
"Huh?" She struck a thoughtful pose. "I suppose you inherited some intelligence from your mother's side."
"What are you even talking about?"
"Well, Denkar wouldn't really stop to think and just act based on his emotions first thing. You act just like him sometimes. But… I suppose you do have some sense, which he didn't."
Well, I'm technically almost as old as him. And technically older than him back when he used to make rash decisions. Then again, that dude is still kind of rash. Not that I could complain.
"So, who convinced you to stay?" Chamille said.
"Barack Senior."
"Barack senior? You mean your father."
Oops. I might have spoken my mind a bit too frankly. "Yes, yes, I meant father."
"Well, he is your father of course," she winked.
I couldn't help but just stare… the nurse too.
Anyway, with that over I went back to the library for the umpteenth time today and settled down over at the geography section. While I did have maps, they weren't very detailed. And I didn't really know much about the demon continent. Or the routes, or the islands either.
But I need to learn demon tongue. Almost all good maps on the demon continent and stuff near that place happened to be in demon tongue.
The ship wreck happened somewhat close to the demon continent or so Miss Chamille said. Of course, I wasn't satisfied with that information so I immediately sent a mail to the shipyard and asked for a thorough clarification. I didn't forget to flaunt my rank and connections but I had little hope it would lead to anything.
Anyway, for now I paid close attention to the maps. I also asked the librarian to introduce me to a demon who could teach me more about the geography of the demon continent. Right now, even if I ended up going there, I was just going to end up screwed thanks to the language barrier and the fact that I knew absolutely nothing about them. Sure, most demons knew Western or Southern tongue. But I would have absolutely no idea if they just screwed with me and cheated the hell out of me. Besides, I was a child and an easy prey.
***
Three days later, the Librarian introduced me to Lady Hilda, an aristocratic well-dressed lady who knew demon tongue.
She seemed human at first glance, but upon closer inspection, I saw small horns perking up from underneath her blonde hair. Is this what you call a halfbreed?
She seemed to have picked up on my confusion and proceeded to explain that her noble father impregnated a lowly demon from the stables and that birthed her.
I had a distinct feeling she viewed herself different from fellow demons and didn't like her mother much. But of course, I was just getting ahead of myself.
"Well then, I will give you a set of symbols; be sure to memorize them and the tones by tomorrow."
Eh?
Huh?
Well, this is going to be difficult. I didn't learn many languages in my past life. Just five-ish. But I knew how to learn languages effectively, part of why I learned Sea tongue so efficiently, despite having average memory. However, I couldn't apply them to the demon tongue because of how barbaric the written language looked in contrast to something like the Southern tongue which basically looked like fancy curvy Arabic.
Well, I guess I had to memorize this thing eventually. "I'll give it my best shot."
"Good."
That was it.
A/N
Caught a cold at the worst possible moment. Might be the last chapter of the week.