Chapter 11: A job for a hero
Harley and I sat in the library until the evening, and our solitude was interrupted again by Barbara coming up.
"Did you want something?" the redhead's silence began to strain a little.
"What do you think about it?"
There was a newspaper for eighteen hundred and ninety-four on the table, which the girl had asked me about last time. The article was written about a dead man who rose from the grave and was honorably defeated by a Green Lantern. According to tradition, the Lantern itself was previously beaten by the monster due to its immunity to the hero's superpowers.
"Events that have passed a century since? In Metropolis, a man in tights is flying through the sky, so you won't impress anyone with ordinary zombies anymore."
No, but really, what can I say about this? Just about the fact that our planet already had a Green Lantern a hundred years ago, and Hal Jordan is not the first, but it's so obvious.
"This zombie's name was Solomon Grundy and yesterday someone trashed the mansion of Virginia and Georgia Bolton, and the traces of destruction are similar to those that were a hundred years ago, besides, both victims unanimously claim that it was him."
"Do you propose to investigate this case?"
"Exactly," the Mousey replied with a smile. "I read about him in the legends of Gotham, last time he attacked the founders of this city for five days in a row until the Green Lantern dealt with him, so we have every chance to detain him earlier to minimize damage."
[Quest generated: Monster. Neutralize the monster. Reward: 5 free points]
Oh, feel like a witcher... Still, someone would have paid with a minted coin, but getting points for leveling would also be nice.
"Then what are we waiting for?"
I quickly got up from the table, grabbed my bag and headed after Barbara, but...
"Oh, Mr. Jay, wait! I can't move that fast."
Harley was definitely not ready for such a fast movement, so we pick up the squeaking girl in my arms and hurry to the exit. But our departure to the Bristol area on the mainland of Gotham has stalled.
"And how are you going to get there?" Batgirl asked us when she approached the mini bike parked outside the library.
"Um... Somehow I missed this moment."
Damn, in comics and cartoons everything is just elementary: we make a small timeskip and the characters already find themselves in the right place, bypassing all obstacles magically. But in real life, any movement on transport, especially remarkable, for example, on the Batmobile – it's very noticeable. Now we have to overcome the path almost from the center of the Somerset district to the Burnley district, from where you can cross the bridge to Bristol.
If we try to get to the sewers and underground catacombs, it is quite feasible, despite the river separating the districts, but it will take more than a day of time. Besides, not all areas of the underground part of the city are safe.
"Okay, here's the deal. We'll take a cab and meet you at the exit to the left of the Trigate Bridge. It's under development and there shouldn't be too many people there anyway," I suggested that's not a bad idea.
"Okay, that won't be a problem... Are you going to go to the case like that?"
"No, of course not. I'll change into my normal clothes, just like Harley."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Gordon's daughter shook her head in the negative. "If they see me in the company of two lunatics, they'll think I'm the same and put me in Arkham! My career as a heroine will be completely closed to me! Batman won't even look at me after that. Or rather, he'll look at me to put me behind bars as the Joker's accomplice."
"Uh, why don't you come be a hero with us? We seem to be getting along pretty well."
"Thanks, but I'll pass. Damn... Why did I even suggest this idea to you guys, I could have been halfway there by now."
"All right, take it easy. We'll disguise ourselves so no one will recognize us, I promise."
"Watch me," the girl jumped on her two-wheeler and sped off northward, deftly maneuvering through the traffic.
Left alone, the first thing we did was head to the nearest mall, where we quickly purchased the necessary props, and where I was able to dye my conspicuous hair black. I had to carefully counsel Harley to get exactly what was needed, then we caught a cab and headed for Bristol. The money was flowing away all too rapidly.
Gotham at night was a very gloomy metropolis. Our previous evening ride on public transportation had been less oppressive, because we were looking forward to getting home, and we could talk about distracting topics, and the lights on the bus were brightly lit, hiding the world around us. But now, the majestic and gloomy buildings, decorated with gargoyles, towered over our heads and pressed down on us. There was a sense of doom and hopelessness in the air. Lonely passersby tried to get home as quickly as possible, running from one streetlight to another while carefully avoiding the dark areas. Why the city's founder decided to stick to such an oppressive architectural style is unclear, but the Joker's love of bright colors that bring some variety to this gray palette is partially understandable, and it looks like I'm going to become a real fan of the Hounds by wearing their merch.
After passing the bridge, which slightly diluted the gloomy cityscapes with a view of the serene river, we asked the driver to drop us off at the nearest bus stop, after which we hid in one of the dark alleys of the city and changed into our new looks.
It was time to go to the meeting place.
"Mousey, are you here?" I asked a question into the darkness as we reached the right exit.
"Here... And what are those outfits?"
"Oh, allow me to introduce myself, the Knight of Moonlight and my incomparable assistant Sailor Moon."
I was dressed almost exactly like Tuxedo Mask from the Sailor Moon anime: a white shirt, the same color gloves and bowtie, a black cylinder with a purple ribbon, and a black jacket with large gilded buttons. A dark cloak with a red hem was thrown over my shoulders, not very practical, but I couldn't find anything else. My image was completed by a heavy cane with a Г-shaped handle and a live rose. My assistant was dressed in a classic Sailor Fuku, wearing a small white mask on her face, hiding only her eyes, and holding a metal baseball bat in her hand. While we were at the mall I enlightened Harley a bit about girl wizards and she liked the image.
"A flower, for a beautiful stranger," I slipped the plant into the hands of a bewildered Batgirl.
"Thank you... Whoa! What the hell are you dressed like that for?! Wait, is that a sex shop costume?!" the young heroine looked closely at the blonde's costume.
"Yeah, what's the big deal? I've worn mini shorts before, and now I'm even more dressed up."
"Damn, I'm going to go so crazy... What's with all these stupid nicknames?"
"Hey, they're not stupid. They're good ones. I picked them myself to match our costumes. Hmm, Knight of Moonlight is long to pronounce and it can become critical in times of danger, so you can call me simply: Knight."
"Okay, that's it, be quiet. At least now you're unlikely to be recognized as a couple of psychos... I mean, they'll recognize you as psychos, but they'll think you're different."
"Dressing up like a bat and beating up muggers with various villains is a bit of an aberration, too," Harley showed Barbara her tongue.
The hurt girl muttered something under her breath and turned and headed deeper into the alley, beckoning us to follow.
"What are you guys dragging around for?" she whispered after five minutes of walking.
"I'm sorry, but I can't walk that fast: the buttpug is getting in the way."
"So get it out!" said the irritated heroine.
"Just a second," Harley, or rather Sailor Moon slipped her hand under her swimsuit and pulled out an accessory with an imitation ruby on the end.
"Eww, put that away!" Barbara immediately bounced two meters away.
"And it's not "Eww." I've got it clean in there, thanks to the boost from Ivy I've pretty much got all my food digested with no residue, and I've additionally rinsed everything in there."
"Damn, I don't want to hear that," our ally turned crimson once more. "Just put it away."
"But I don't have any pockets... Why don't you put it in your pocket? That's a cool belt you got there with a lot of compartments."
"Don't even think about it. It's specifically for gadgets, not your kinky stuff."
"But we're friends, if you want to use it later, I won't mind."
"Use it later..." the girl in the bat suit pretended to vomit. "Gross, I'll never do that kind of thing. It's disgusting. Also... We're not friends!"
"And it's nothing disgusting, it feels really good. I even came when Mr. J was stretching me out. It felt so good to be filled," my perverted assistant rolled her eyes, pressing herself harder against me.
"I don't want to hear about it! Just put that thing away and that's it! We're going zombie hunting and you're suffering bullshit. Give it to your Mr. J, after all."
"Oh, right. Mr. J?" the blonde girl in a Japanese schoolgirl costume, I'd even say the very perverted Japanese schoolgirl, handed me the object of contention, which I wrapped a handkerchief around and tucked into my pocket.
"Knight of Moonlight. Girls, don't ruin the disguise."
***
The mansion we needed was surrounded by police tape, and there were a couple police officers on duty nearby, sitting in their car, so it wasn't difficult for us to enter the forbidden territory by making a small detour.
Spreading out, we began scouring the ruins for clues. Harley and I had enough moonlight to navigate the terrain, but the young heroine had to use a night vision device, so as not to demask herself with the light of a flashlight.
"I think I found something," the blonde was the first to respond, calling us over to her.
On the ground was the imprint of a huge foot, size sixteen. If not bigger.
"Wow, it looks like it really is some kind of monster..."
Solomon Grundy I only remembered from Batman: Arkham City, but there this rebel zombie was clearly several times larger than he is now. Maybe in the game he increased in size due to Penguin's experiments?
"Oddly, the trail cuts off next," Batgirl walked a few meters deeper into the park, where the zombie had probably gone, and came back out again.
Some impropriety scratched at my consciousness. A trail and a trail, just a healthy one, but there was something off about it...
"The sole. Look, there's no relief, just a flat smooth surface," I carefully traced the outline. "If he was barefoot, there would still be the relief of the toes. Shoes, in principle, could have erased to smoothness, but that's unlikely. Here, the ground feels like it's been pressed down."
"Hmm... You're right, though," the girl glanced at her watch. "It's nearing midnight... Last time the monster attacked at this time. I suggest we visit the Winslow mansion and ambush it."
"Why him?"
"Because there were three founding families: the Bolton, the Winslow and the Parishe. The latter have long since sold off their possessions and moved away, so only the Winslow remain," the young heroine climbed under the police fence and made her way back. "Their mansion is nearby, surrounded by the homes of Eastern European laborers, there's also an interesting wax museum nearby, which is notable for the fact that they're manufactured there."
"How only she knows all this..." Harley muttered. She wanted to beat up zombies, but instead she's doing detective work like some Nancy Drew.
"It's just that I prepared myself and read the available information on Solomon Grundy. Sometimes it pays to use your head for its intended purpose and learn something new, especially when you're at the library."
"Mr. J likes me better, though, and he likes the way I use my head."
"Ignore her, just ignore her. You're above that..." the red-haired girl in the bat suit recited a mantra, regretting starting this conversation.
The wooded area surrounding the ruined Bolton mansion had been replaced by working-class neighborhoods designed by some crazy architect. Instead of the usual perpendicular streets and alleys, or at least circular and radial lines like in my homeland, it was zigzag routes that led to dead ends fifty percent of the time. All of this was compounded by a nasty fog from the nearby river and marshes. It was a good thing that our escort had a good sense of the terrain, because I hadn't studied the area too closely; without Batgirl we would have wandered around in this labyrinth for a long time.
"Hey, weirdos!" A man called out to us near one of the alleys. "Halloween's not for another week."
"It's a practice run, to get a better idea of where to hunt for candy," I answered immediately, and then turned to my companions. "Is this true?"
"Yes," the girls replied in unison.
"Oh, so it's my birthday in a month," I said and bit my tongue, it was unlikely that Joker's was the same as mine.
It may seem strange to tie such an event to an American holiday for a Russian person, but it all started at the institute, when my classmates happily celebrated this day, arranging parties, and the union was not lagging behind, providing the room.
"Really?" marveled my assistant. "We've never celebrated it before, and I didn't even know when it was! We should definitely get you guys something special."
Harley specifically loaded up, so we traveled the rest of the way in silence.
"Here it is."
After a while, we came to a tall wrought iron fence, behind which stood a dingy three-story building, blending in perfectly with the surrounding landscape. There were literally seconds until midnight. Three seconds... Two... One...
"G-r-r-r-r-r-r."
The figure of a three meter tall monster weaved out of the thick fog and slowly moved towards the front door, reciting a creepy poem:
Solomon Grundy,
Born on Monday,
Christened on Tuesday,
Married on Wednesday,
Took ill on Thursday,
Worse on Friday,
Died on Saturday,
Buried on Sunday:
This is the end
Of Solomon Grundy.
~Boom! ~
A powerful blow blew the door off its hinges, and the reanimated dead man fled inside the building, from which came a loud cry for help.
"Hurry."
Hands in a lock and I practically catapult the girls in a living order to a three meter height.
Once at the top, they turn around and hold out their hands to me, all the while glancing at each other. A short run-up and the girls help me to the top.
"G-rah!!!"
~Bang! Bam!"
The roar of a monster and the sounds of furniture breaking could be heard from the house.
"Ha-ha-ha," I had to jump off the fence and roll over gently, gathering all the dirt with my cloak. My body hurts, so the memories help distract me.
"Sailor, jump!" I put my hands up and immediately catch the blonde who didn't doubt me for a second.
"Now you," I said, turning to Mousey.
There's a second's hesitation, but she jumps nonetheless.
Another fifteen seconds of running and we burst into the mansion, seeing Solomon Grundy in a rage smashing the furniture on the first floor. It was indeed a monster. The huge carcass seemed to occupy the entire not insignificant space of the hallway. His skin was an unhealthy cadaverous hue, with ragged shackles dangling from his arms and a cut noose around his neck. Horrible wounds covered his body, but apparently caused little discomfort.
"G-ra-a-a-a!"
"A-a-a-a-a-a!" from somewhere behind the zombie, a deafening scream belonging to a woman sounded again.
"Moon Baseball Bat Power, Make Up!"
With a strange battle cry, Sailor Moon tried to rain down a blow on the living dead, but the weapon only scratched the monster's arm with its very edge, because it managed to turn around nimbly, which was amazing for such a huge carcass. Afterwards, I should definitely discuss battle tactics with my assistant, because we are heroes, not idiots.... Though sometimes those words are synonymous....
The monster froze, looking around at our colorful company and since we've been burned anyway then...
"The Knight of Moonlight will destroy you, monster."
A sharp lunge with his cane at Solomon Grundy's solar plexus managed to knock him back a bit. It was as if I had struck jelly...
"Solomon's not afraid of tiny bugs."
The vertical impact broke through the floor we had been standing on a moment ago. I jumped to the right and the girls to the left, dodging the blow.
"Save woman!" hopefully my exclamation was heard, while I distract the freak.
A new lunge with the cane aimed at the monster's bent knee.
"Gra-a-a!"
I managed to break his balance and even hurt him a little, but my weapon was clearly not designed for such serious loads and cracked a little, clogged with tina and mud from the swamp zombie. No sooner had I rejoiced at my small luck than a powerful blow flew into my torso and threw me back into the next room.
"Ow..." the table "cushioned" my fall, but my body was clearly against such treatment.
"Knight!"
I managed to hear Harley scream before I passed out.
***
"Knight, knight... You wouldn't abandon your princess..."
Something dripped down my cheek.
"S-s-s-s-s... Ha-ha-ha."
"Knight!" the blonde immediately squeezed me in her embrace, realizing that I was alive.
The pain is gone, and my brain is going over the possible options. Since the sounds of fighting can no longer be heard, it means the girls managed to overpower or chase the monster away.
"Sailor, what happened?"
"Grundy has almost completely destroyed the mansion. Neither I nor Mouse could do anything to him... When he finished trashing everything, he just left."
"And it's time for us to leave too," said Batgirl. "The police are on their way, and I don't want to face them. I've already administered first aid to Ms. Winslow."
"Then let's go," I got up, remembering my cane, and headed for the exit. I could already hear the sound of police sirens in the distance.
"Nh..."
I look around, noticing Barbara's left leg slumped over. Looks like the fight didn't go to waste for her.
"What are you looking at?" the redheaded girl notices my gaze and tries to straighten up, but cringes in pain again.
Silently I walk over to her and pick her up in my arms.
"Sailor, let's go."
A light jog in the opposite direction from the sounds of sirens. The girl in my arms doesn't try to break free.
"I'm kind of jealous..." Harley voiced her thoughts.
"Not now," I interrupt my assistant. "We need to get to a safe place as soon as possible, and then we can do the bickering and backstabbing."
The safe place turned out to be one of the alleys about a kilometer away from the battle site.
"You can let me go..." the police commissioner's daughter spoke up as we came to a stop. Strangely enough, carrying the girl was much easier and much more enjoyable than weights.
"How's the leg?"
Carefully placing my burden on the ground.
"Nothing serious, just a little sprain," she, wrinkling her nose, leaned on her sore leg. "I have a bandage."
The click of the container on her belt in her hands turns out to be an elastic bandage.
"Wow, you're almost as close as Bats."
"Not even close," with a sigh Batgirl replied, "stuffed with whatever might come in handy.... Pretty much the entire first aid kit and a couple of stun grenades."
"That's pretty good," I get down on one knee and sit the squealing heroine on a makeshift bench, taking the elastic bandage along the way. "Harley."
My faithful assistant understood me and began to pull off the shoes of the red-haired beauty sitting on my knee.
"Hey, what are you doing!" the cutie tried to get up, but I held her down.
"First aid, of course, what were you thinking?"
"Nothing..." the girl got a little blush.
"It's just a sprain," the blonde gave her verdict as she carefully felt the injured leg.
"I already knew that... And you couldn't care less..."
Sailor, gently stroked the girl's foot, working each toe.
"This kind of massage speeds up blood circulation... Also, you're so fun to embarrass..."
"Okay, let me out," the newly blushing Mousey tried to stand up.
"Hold on. Harley, finish up," I handed her a bandage, which she deftly wrapped around Batgirl's injured leg.
"Try not to strain it too much," advised my beloved as she stood up.
"Thank you," Batgirl gingerly leaned on the injured limb and acknowledged the bandage as satisfactory.
Intercepting the cane, I noticed some movement at the end.
"What's that?"
Looking closely, I could see that small pieces of cloth and tin were slowly fluttering in the wind. A slight twist of the cane and the fabric changes its direction, as if striving for somewhere. Although stop, it wasn't the cloth fluttering, but the sand that was clinging to it, which occasionally detached and flowed in one direction.
"Clayface!" It dawned on me.
"What?" both girls interjected in unison and looked at each other. Harley immediately broke out into a smile and winked, while Barbara looked confused.
"It wasn't Solomon Grundy. It was the Clayface who pretended to be him," without delay, I followed the grains of sand, using my walking stick as a compass. "That's why the trail I found was so strange, it lacked detail."
"But why would he pretend to be Grundy and attack the founders of Gotham? Couldn't he pretend to be someone else and make it all go away without a fuss?" Harley asked the logical question and was immediately answered by Commissioner Gordon's thoughtful daughter.
"It would take a lot of time and money to drain the swamps of Gotham. It's unlikely that anyone will do it, especially if no one's been killed, and it's just plain dangerous.... And you'll notice that Grundy has been destroying houses almost completely, I'm sure that's how he's been hiding the jewelry theft. If he does go missing after three days, they won't even look for him."
"We are in place."
While the heroine was explaining her point of view we reached a notable building.
"Beautiful... The Сlayface, who can disguise himself as anyone, is hiding in a wax museum... Any idea how to apprehend him? I don't see any liquid nitrogen tanks around here," the sarcasm in my voice, even the dumbest of dummies could pick up on it.
"Last time they overpowered him with high voltage. There's something going on with the clay that's replacing his cells."
"We should lure him to the roof," suggested Harley, pointing to the high-voltage line.
"Mousey, why don't you wait for us here?" I asked without much hope.
Rolling her eyes, the heroine was the first to enter the museum grounds.
Walking around the perimeter of the building, we cracked the back door and made our way inside. My cane served as a guide, but it didn't last long, for the grains of sand began to dwindle faster as we approached our target.
"Sailor," I whispered, "go to the roof and set up the trap. No arguments."
Barbara would definitely refuse the honor. I could go myself, but I didn't want to make the girls fight a monster, so that leaves only one option.
"Alright," with a short nod, she moved closer to me and pecked my cheek, and then in one jerk she moved closer to the heroine who didn't have time to react and kissed her lips, crumpling what she could reach.
"M-m-m..." Carrot couldn't actively resist for fear of giving away our presence.
"For good luck," the blonde whispered quietly, heading for the roof.
The red Batgirl glared fiercely in my assistant's wake, then focused her gaze on me.
"And you're not embarrassed by this?"
"You looked great in that moment."
"And the fact that you got a peck on the cheek and I... kissed on the lips doesn't make you jealous?" the girl wanted to hurt me, but she got the wrong guy.
"Not really, plus Harley didn't brush her teeth when she gave me a blowjob in the library, so she got it right."
"Eww..." Barbara stuck her tongue out in disgust, but didn't say anything else. And I could understand her, for we had reached the door behind which the lamp burned. The last grains of sand disappeared behind the closed door.
I pointed my finger at the cable going into the room.
"I don't think there's a generator in that room, so the power source is somewhere else. Now you and I are going to unhook all the staples so that the length of the cable is long enough for you to hide behind that closet," I whispered, leaning in close to my companion's ear. "Then you cut the cable, and I kick the door open and start making noise, distracting the Clayface. Then you retreat to the closet and prepare to attack the villain from behind as I lure him out."
The girl nodded, accepting my plan, so I once again have to act as a ladder, letting the heroine do her job. The deed is done, and the final touch is left. I remove my hands, leaving her hanging on one arm, hooked onto some pipe, and prepare to kick the door in myself.
~Sharp~
With a quiet grinding sound, the knife breaks contact.
~Bam!~
I kick the door in, drowning out the noise of Barbara jumping off, who, grabbing the wire, moved towards the ambush site.
"The Knight of Moonlight will not let you escape Justice, villain!"
"Man... Have you been reading too many comic books?"
Sitting across from me with his feet up on the table was a creature made up almost entirely of brown mud. The only thing that was different in color were large, crooked yellow teeth and yellow eyes with no separation between the whites and irises, with a black pupil in the center.
Damn... That's not what I expected to see. No aggression in his gaze.
"You pretended to be Grundy and attacked the poor people of Gotham!"
"Well, I'm an AC-TOR," the monster emphasized the last word, saying it in a chant. "And it was one of my best roles... Except it's not desirable that the police start hunting for me again.... By the way, where are your girlfriends?"
"A true knight shouldn't endanger beautiful ladies," add more pathos to my voice and stand in a spiritualized pose.
"Hmm... So... Well, I guess the museum could use another exhibit of the weird weirdo..."
A second, and in my direction rushes a shapeless wave of mud, from which I leave by rolling.
"You can't get away!" gathering himself into a lump, the Clayface lunged at me again, but I managed to wriggle out of the way, bursting out into the hallway.
"Well where are you going "hero"."
I retreated toward the lurking Batgirl, mimicking a full-body shiver.
The villain, gathering himself back into his original form, slowly stepped towards me. Move back... Move back... I stumble and fall on purpose, expressing my fear.
"Are you afraid? Well that's okay, wax figures don't experience afra-A-A-A-A!
Clayface's entire body bubbled up and then fell off in a shapeless heap, only small discharges showing that it wasn't just mud.
[Quest Monster completed. Neutralize the monster. Reward: 5 free points]
"Is he finished?" the heroine gingerly approached the defeated Clayface.
"Yeah, the important thing is to keep the power on. Let's go pick up Sailor and call the police."
From there, it was simple: five minutes to pick up my sweetheart, who almost electrocuted me thinking I was a shifter, another five to call the police from the nearest pay phone, and then half an hour to get to the parked moped and our bags of normal clothes.
"That was awesome! A real hero's work," Barbara, like me, was enthusiastic. The only disgruntled person in our company was Harley.
"You guys had a great time. You took all the fun out of it."
"Sunshine," I hugged the sad blonde, "don't feel bad, because unlike me, you tried your bat on a monster, and I only used my cane a couple times before I flew away. Besides, someone's gonna have a little extra fun tonight," my hand shook the girl's butt.
"Yeah. But how are we gonna get home? The buses don't run at 1:00 in the morning, and calling a cab is an unnecessary risk of getting burned."
Our eyes crossed on Barbara, who was pulling out of the moped.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
***
"Harley, get your hands off me or I'm not going anywhere," the heroine was firm in her decision.
"But how am I supposed to hold on?"
"By my waist, not my breasts! Why the hell did I even agree to this?"
"Because real heroes don't abandon their comrades in distress?" I curiously watched the fiddling of the girls, sitting on the very edge and hugging my assistant around the waist with one arm while the other held our duffel bag. Mouse flatly refused to let me in front, as well as in the middle, which, of course, saddened, but not much.
"And you don't say anything, or better yet, you should harass her, we're not really going anywhere like this!"
"You two look so cute together. All right, Harley, finish it, or we'll really be home by morning."
At last our vehicle moved, and we made a breezy drive to Somerset, successfully avoiding all the traffic checkpoints.
"Pull over here!" I yelled, patting Babs on the shoulder.
"What?" asked the heroine who had stopped the mini bike.
"Thanks for the ride. We'll take it from here. It was really cool working with you, be sure to call us for another case, but without Bats, because I don't feel like going to Arkham yet."
"I don't feel like going there either. I enjoyed working with you too–"
"We-e-e-e-e!" the harlequin interrupted Barbara's speech by starting to hug her.
"–Except for this one," panting, Mousey tried to shove the enthusiastic Harley away from her, but her efforts were doomed to failure.
"We've become real friends," my assistant rubbed her head against the disgruntled girl like a dog.
"No, we didn't, get off me! J, get her off me! ... Wait, what are you doing!
I walked over and hugged both girls, lifting them slightly off the ground.
"Sorry, I couldn't help myself. Harley, let's go or I won't have time to punish your ass."
"Coming, Mr. J," the blonde immediately unhooked herself from the young heroine and took me under her arm.
"Damn, why did I get involved with that crazy couple?" the red-haired girl muttered to herself, but her question went unanswered.
***
"I can't believe I'm doing this."
Taking a deep breath, as if before jumping into the water, Barbara Gordon adjusted her wig and oversized black glasses, then pushed inside the door of a conspicuous store with a red inviting sign and the numbers 18+.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone