An abandoned child can never forget the pain and suffering which he had to go through. Wounds have a habit of healing with time but the psychological scar left in the mind because of the pain they endured, that scar never goes away. And whenever you touch that scar, even after healing, it'll hurt like hell.
Guilt is suffering in itself. Especially when you didn't deserve that guilt in the first place. A mistake whether done in levity or not is still a mistake. And the mistake of taking a life, that's one of the biggest mistakes one could do in life.
In this world filled with hypocrites, one often can't retain their innocence. We were born innocent once. But no one dies as an innocent person. Our mistakes and guilts accompany us to the grave.
We all need some fluffy moments after a heavy one. Hopefully, you enjoyed the chapter. Since I can't help with SS. I can only help in decreasing my word count.
If you want, I'll only write 1000 word per chapter which will cost you like 5 SS, I think. If this idea suits you, please do let me know in the comment section. Thank you!