best dirty joke stories

BOOK 1 BOOK 2 SECRET's out ah *side note: No it's not just smut, it has a plot. The name has another meaning. You dirty-minded people! some scenes will be dark* *ongoing editing* Meet Wu Jie Tyna; the third-born daughter of Chaos darkness. Also known as lady darkness. During the ongoing chaos war, Tyna had experienced her first death and was later reborn in her second life, due to her failure as the 100th legion General. In that life, on Gai (sometimes Gaia), known as Earth to many, Tyna had lived the first six years of her life suffering, the latter half because she had - due to the fact of releasing her inner monster after a betray- Became something that took the life force from those who, 'died for her' in order to survive. Sadly one-night drunk, Tyna fell in the wharf and was therefore eaten by... Ah... Sharks. Third life: Wu Jie Tyna, had been transmigrated as an ah... A child. In a world newly populated by humans and other fantastical creatures, the world is harsh where if one is not powerful enough or at least has a backer strong enough death will welcome them with open arms. --- Tyna somewhat both lucky and Unlucky have heeded to the words her mother had bestowed the previous body's owner; In the world, people focus on something that to us was trivial. Of course, we live in society as those below us, but our circles? Our circles were small, we lived far above them, and treated these lowly ones nothing more than cannon fodder. Your beliefs? Who cares, Your system? Freedom? It was broken long before it was even created, all of you were nothing more to us than playthings. Haha haha, how stupid it is nothing more but an illusion for those high above us out of reach to be entertained. That was before in the greed of the top families we fell, we suffered and as if nature itself found our ways disgusting our hidden island was sunk and we had to leave our safe haven, to live among those... We had looked down upon.' 'if that is so mom, then we are different' 'of course, those from the east, said they were the motherland but we knew otherwise. Those who were our slaves are now our equal' 'we may have lost our home and have become outnumbered but it is fine, each family will marry their sons to the daughters.' 'the society is patriarch' 'it will not and have not affected the families, as long as our blood is not tainted then we shall continue to prosper in this barbaric society'. --- ongoing editing Original work no translation Please rate, comment, and vote thanks all

“... Till death do us apart.” It was a love promise. Nicolás Moreno has lived his life under the shadows, he was a name whispered for his cruel ways and cold-heartedness, known for being a sadist whose only emotion was hate, his face was thought to be a reflection of his ugly heart. When one dinner changes everything for the gentle, kind Annalise Armillo, she finds herself in church the next day with a different identity and now to be married to the most loathsome person ever, and for a man who enjoys other people's misery, breaking a pure-hearted, sweet woman like Anna was going to give Nicolás all of the satisfaction he craved, the only thing he doesn't plan on is the innocent-looking woman's ability to arouse the dirtiest desires in him. “... Till death do us apart.” It was a threat.

Hiatus, indefinitely

Sumire Massoullevè, is one of the highest-paid actresses and entitled the top 1 most beautiful woman in the world. The sole daughter of one of the richest business tycoons couple in the country, Sumire has been known for being stubborn and persistent since she was a little girl, she was glamorous yet dark. Born spoiled, Sumire gets everything that she wanted. Being an actress is one of her dreams but dejected by her parents, she still pursues it. Despite having everything she wants, Sumire felt completely unsatisfied. There are two things she greatly desired: One, to meet her favorite mysterious artist in the world of Arts who hides under the pseudonym of DEATH, known for painting high class abstract and tenebrism crime scene arts, an art she admires the most and had a hot night-stand with him. The second was to make the infamous Asexual Ruffian Boss, Mort Dmitriv Aslanov, fall for her. In her unswerving pursuit of the man, Sumire was lost and discovered the gritty world of mafias, crimes, and murders, the swarm of mobs and gangs. Is falling to the Heartless Mafia Boss worth regardless of the difference of their world that may lead her to her demise? Will love and lust collide?

Secrets! Secrets! And many more secrets! This was something that everyone on the planet, rich or poor, had in common. This also applied to my family. As I grew older, I became more interested in delving deeper into trying to learn for myself what my parents were hiding from me. I had not imagined, however, that the farther I delved into the issue, the more questions I began to ask myself. I began to consider how heinous and horrifying all of these family secrets would appear to the public if they were ever revealed. And why was I tempted and curious in the first place? But what else could a normal son have done in such a situation? Should I have minded my own business? That was completely impossible. But, considering how things had evolved by the time everything became clear to me, I began to wonder. Why was this the case? My curiosity side got the best of me and placed me in a position I still regret to this day. Would I choose the same road if I had to start from scratch? I am still puzzled about the answer.

HIGHLY RATED(18+) Author's warnings: THIS BOOK MAY CONTAIN HIGHLY SEXUAL CONTENT, ABUSE, ILLEGAL ACTIONS AND DEATH. IF YOU CANT WITHSTAND ANY OF THIS MENTIONED ABOVE, KINDLY PASS BECAUSE IT'S NOT FOR THE WEAK. -------- "There are rules binding this contract, Isabella", Leonardo said to me while staring deeply into my eyes . A shivered ran through my whole body when I heard his cold deep voice. I stared back into his sexy green eyes before I spoke confidentially,"And what's that?". I asked. "Rule number one, you don't touch my body whenever I'm being intimate with you". Say's Leonardo. "Rule number two". I turned to look at Matteo who was laying back on his elbow on the bed with no shirt on and I could tell that he was looking totally hot in that position. I gulped in the lump in my throat when my eyes descended on his well detailed abs. "We can do whatever we want with you and you have no right to object". I felt seriously nervous with the way their eyes were scrutinizing my whole body and it took me enough confident to turn to look at Leonardo. "Is that all?". I asked and then, he brought out a pen and offered it to me. "Sign the contract and be ours". Leonardo said to me but that wasn't what just I wanted, I wanted to be more than a SLUT to them. Meet the Domenico brother's, who kills people for a living. A mafia and the world's greatest nightmare. What happens when a contract of submission is offered to the innocent Miss Isabella Laurenza? Would their relationship turns out to be lust or bloody??? Find out, rated 18+

Rules of Engagement 1. Be available every Friday evening to Saturday morning. 2. Be ready. (Groomed to my standards.) 3. You're not to discuss this arrangement or details of this contract with anyone. 4. This is not a relationship, there will be no such expectations. 5. Do not fall in love. This is grounds for dismissal... The rules of the contract are very clear. They are in place for a reason. So why does Evelyn think she can just walk out on him? Why does she think she can keep testing and pushing his limits? It's not over until he says it is. Perhaps it's time he showed her what it means to be owned by Roman Ashfield.

Kai Hunter is H University’s biggest player and heartbreaker. Known for his good looks and for being one of the brightest students on campus, he is one of the most eligible bachelors that everyone wants to ‘tame’. However, everything changes when freshman Night Winters becomes his new dorm mate. Kai is instantly attracted to the hot, young freshman who he had caught having a one-night stand at a bar and hasn’t been able to get out of his mind ever since. Night is openly gay, but Kai has been into girls his whole life…or so he thought. Can he let go of his pride and accept Night for who he is? Or will Night forever be forced to be just his dirty little secret, under the sheets, inside the closed doors to their dorm? However, Night is hiding secrets that can break the fragile foundation of their relationship at any time, and if Kai waits any longer…he just might end up losing the only person precious to him.

After being exiled from the country where he spent much of his childhood, Ronan Seamus Hemming found himself traveling to The United States Of America in search of a new life. He found it in front of a camera as a male model and quickly elevated his status among the citizens of New Jersey, on the surface he represents what many aspire to be, a self made billionaire, a known philanthropist, and a dabbler in chemistry, Ron seemed to have it all...good looks, fast cars, and just about everyone he meets throwing themselves at him be it man or woman, but beneath the ruggedly handsome exterior lies a heart of the deepest darkness belonging to a vile being whom had successfully blended into the lifestyle of the rich and famous only to end up in the crosshairs of a notorious Wolf Hunter.

Who knew a package could change someone’s life? Inside the box, contained her neighbor’s dirty secret. A secret that would change her life forever. Warning: Mature and threesomes.