jokes or funny stories

Another joke. What's an IT expert's favorite place? The space bar. Because it's always so spaced out.

Here's one. A doctor says to a patient, 'You're obese.' The patient says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor replies, 'Okay, you're ugly too.'

Another joke is: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself! These kind of jokes add a lot of humor to the Thanksgiving spirit.

Here's a funny chicken joke. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide! It's a simple play on words that always makes people chuckle.

Of course, I can collect some funny stories and jokes for you. Here are some examples: 1 A man went to the movies and realized he had watched too much, so he said,"I can tell this movie is so bad." Another said,"No, you just heard all the rhythms." 2 A man said to his girlfriend,"I like you a little." His girlfriend said,"So much?" I don't have any." The man said,"No, I just like your smile." 3 A man asked his girlfriend,"You have a little blue eyes." His girlfriend said,"Yes, I ordered blue glasses." The man said,"No, I'm just saying that I have blue eyes and you have blue glasses." 4 When a man heard that he often chatted with a young man, he said,"I think the coolest thing about young people is that they are a little fat." The subject said," No, the coolest thing is to experience some surprises." The guy said," No, you're not as cool as me. I've been through some of the coolest things, like being thought of as a princess." A man asked his girlfriend,"What do you like about me?" His girlfriend said,"I like the way you talk to me." The man said,"No, what I like is that you can understand me." I hope these jokes can help you satisfy your needs!

Here's a joke. Two gay men were arguing about who was the better cook. One said, 'I can make the most amazing soufflé.' The other replied, 'Well, I can make a quiche that'll make you forget all about soufflés!' And they both ended up laughing and cooking together.

A good joke is: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything. As for a story, there was a man who was always late for work. One day, he told his boss that he had a dream the night before where he was early for work and there was no traffic. His boss said, 'Well, why don't you try coming to work like that tomorrow?'

Here is a funny joke. A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store. Another one, a guy goes to the doctor and says, 'Doctor, I think I'm a dog.' The doctor asks, 'How long have you felt this way?' The guy says, 'Ever since I was a puppy!'

Alright, here's a funny joke: One day, a snail wanted to go to the movies, but he couldn't climb a tree, so he decided to go to a nearby pond to watch a movie. When the snail reached the pond, it saw a huge movie screen. It began to crawl slowly toward the screen but soon stopped. It began to think,"Where should I start climbing?" At this time, a frog walked by and saw the snail's question, so it said,"You don't have to crawl. You can jump directly to the screen!" The snail nodded and jumped onto the screen. However, when it looked up at the movie, it realized that there was no movie on the screen! It was very surprised and asked,"Why isn't the movie on the screen?" When the frog heard this question, it immediately replied,"Because the movie screen is a two-dimensional plane with no thickness, so the movie is not inside!" The snail thought for a moment and then said,"Oh, I know. I should crawl under it!" At this moment the frog came over again and said,"No, you should climb over it!" "I'm sorry," he said.

The following were all funny jokes: A bird flew into an orchard and saw a sheep lying on the ground, so he asked the sheep,"why are you lying here?" "I'll wait for the apples," answered the sheep."They haven't fallen yet." The bird asked,"Why don't you bite the grass?" The sheep replied,"I'd better wait for the apples to fall. They're much tastier than grass!" 2 went to a bar alone and got drunk. His friend was very worried about him and decided to help him go home. When they arrived at his house, his friends tried to help him to the door, but the man kept crying,"Don't take me back to the zoo!" "Why are you going to the zoo?" His friend asked in surprise. The man replied,"Didn't I tell you? I'm dead drunk. You take him back to the zoo so I can go see lions and tigers!" A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. He asked the rabbit,"What do you want to eat?" "I want to eat carrots," the rabbit replied. He asked the bird,"What do you want to eat?" The bird replied,"I want to eat rabbits." The man immediately let go of the rabbit and the bird flew away. The man was very angry and asked the rabbit,"why did you fly away?" The rabbit replied,"I wanted to eat carrots, so I went to look for it."