dirty jokes for a girl to tell a guy

Lin Xinlan, who possessed both spatial and wood manipulation abilities, was betrayed by her boyfriend and best friend. They had drugged her and sent her to a laboratory to become a test specimen all for the sake of a month’s worth of food supply. Having suffered both physical and mental torture, she chose to self-destruct, taking the lab researchers down with her! When she woke up again, she found herself in another era as a twelve-year-old girl named Lin Yuelan.When Lin Yuelan was nine years old, a Taoist who had been begging for water asserted that she would grow up to jinx her husband! Rumors spread and the assertion of her jinxing her husband turned into jinxing her parents, to her relatives, then her friends, and eventually she was said to be a jinx of the world. Her grandparents, uncles, and awful relatives were terrified of being jinxed to death, so they resolutely severed ties with nine-year-old Lin Yuelan. They removed her from the family register and made her live on her own. Her foolish father had obeyed the clan’s wishes, her mother was a crying mess, and her siblings couldn’t do anything to help. Being separated from the family at nine years old, she was given a shabby and shaky little hut, one paddy field, and two dry fields as severance compensation. From then on, the Lin family had nothing to do with Lin Yuelan, and Lin Yuelan became a girl with no background. She warily reached the age of twelve, but accidentally offended the village’s bully. The bully’s comrade eventually beat her to death, and that allowed Lin Xinlan to transmigrate onto her.“I have spatial abilities, and the world will be mine! Watch as I, Lin Xinlan, command authority wherever I go, and become a supreme being!”

Fu Jiu appears to be a normal lad in high school on the surface. But in fact, she (Yes! She!) is the hacker, Z, a villain-terminator in the online world of an alternate world. Having reincarnated into the body of a woman and being forced to disguise herself as a young man, she reigns over the game world, fights for justice, and puts a spell on all the girls around with her innate charm. However, her flirting comes across as gay to the rich Almighty Qin and his inner circle. Over time, the Almighty Qin falls for him… her. Has he turned gay for him… her? Now, that's confusing! Keywords: Rebirth, Face-slapping, Online gaming, Pet lover, Hacking, Chocolate-flavored lollipop Sugary Scene: Fu Jiu said, "Almighty Qin, do you have a girlfriend?" Qin Mo lowered his laptop. "No." Fu Jiu lowered her voice and started flirting carelessly. "You have one now, me." Upon hearing that, Qin Mo pounced on Fu Jiu domineeringly! Fu Jiu was stunned. "Wait, what are you doing?" Qin Mo replied, "Exercising my boyfriend rights." Please support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/henyeetranslationsNSPG If we hit certain milestones, we will release more chapters in a mass release as well as increase the release rate!

It was 12 years ago. The empress gave birth to a princess. She declared to the public that she was a boy, named Xia Shimin. Three years ago, Xia Shimin was made the crown prince and arranged a marriage with the present Grand Preceptor's daughter, thus securing the imperial power. ...... Zhang Ronghua crossed over at her birth. As a proper forbidden soldier, he has been hiding out for 15 years in the royal residence. Every day that passed, his talent would increase by one point. Seeing that the wedding date was getting closer, he accidentally found out that the crown prince was a woman. The night of the wedding. Prince: I need you to marry me!

Mum ran away, dad's crippled, and I'm about to be sold to a brothel. Qiao Xiaomai rolled up her sleeves in anger: If you've taken from me, regurgitate it. If you've seized what's mine, return it. All scumbags, clear off. A certain man finished tidying up the mess, rolled up his sleeves and pulled Qiao Xiaomai into a light laugh: "My lady, if you're this fiery and domineering at night, your husband..." Qiao Xiaomai raised an eyebrow, patted the spot next to her: "My dear, come warm the bed~"

After dying from a strange terminal illness, Ling Lan was reborn into a world 10000 years into the future. Although she dearly wished she could just live a peaceful and uneventful life in her new healthy body, fate had other plans ... Forced to disguise herself as a boy just so she could inherit her deceased father's premium military benefits, Ling Lan's journey to adulthood was full of challenges. After much difficulty, she finally turned sixteen when she could drop the charade. But before she could grasp her newfound freedom to get married and start her own family, a twist of fate results in her being thrown into the Federation's top military boys' school. With these twists of fate, Ling Lan had little choice but to walk further and further down a path of no return, one of cold and aloof dominance ... ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ryuxenji the translator here. :3 Here are some other things you should know: 1) This story is NOT primarily a romance. QI's system right now categorizes all novels taken from the female novel Chinese site (起点女生网) as 'romance' without fail, regardless of whether they truly are romance. So, if you are here just for the romance, you might want to find a different novel. There will be some romance eventually, but most of this novel is Sci-Fi/Xianxia with a lot of world-building and character development. 2) I use British spelling. So, please ensure spelling errors are really errors before reporting them. 3) No matter what the release rate up top says, the guaranteed release rate right now is 1 chp/day (a.k.a. 7 chps/week). All else is extra at my discretion. (I'll try my best, but RL responsibilities come first.)

Jiang Xiaobai reincarnated to another world and was forced to marry a dragon. Moreover, it was a hot-tempered female dragon. Jiang Xiaobai was in despair when he thought of his future of being tortured by his wife. He could not choose his fate of being reincarnated, but he could choose to be a faithful man even though he had to marry an irascible dragon maiden! [Ding! God-tier Option System has been activated after sensing your earnest summon.] [Option 1: Marry her. Reward: Dragon Essence and Tiger Bone Pills] [Option 2: Reject her. Reward: Demigod level cultivation] [Option 3: Boldly speak your mind about her. Reward: Innate Body of the Way and God-level martial arts technique.] Jiang Xiaobai wondered, “Should I marry her or should I reject her?”

In her pursuit of saving enough money to return home, Hannah found herself playing the role of the "first-love" character in a beloved novel. Originally, this character was a typical stand-in supporting actress, taking on various substitutes for the female lead as dictated by the male protagonists, such as donating kidneys or sparing road for the female lead, which she all agreed. Eventually, the original character succumbed to the pressure, turning dark and meeting a tragic demise with a disfigured face on the streets after being killed by the male protagonists. Hannah's task was to follow this grim plotline and achieve the tragic story's intended outcome. However, in the eyes of George River, she was merely a substitute he had enlisted—an entity dependent on him. When his true love returned, he callously abandoned the woman who deeply loved him. Later, he regretted his decision, only to discover that the once-begging woman was now surrounded by various exceptional men. The individuals who had previously used her as a shield—the movie king, the ambitious young actor who climbed over her for his ideal goddess, and the president who regretted his actions upon regaining his memory—all found themselves humbly pleading for her affection: "Hannah, the one I love is you." Confused by the sudden turn of events, Hannah observed her bank account steadily growing and stumbled upon a newfound skill for crafting tragic stories. As the main antagonist who successfully survived until the end of the story, Arnold Simmons was ruthless, dark, and violent. In his eyes, Hannah appeared to be the most naive woman he had ever encountered, her thoughts consumed solely by love. Witnessing her continuous deception by those around her, Arnold eventually reached a breaking point and seized her, declaring, "Stay by my side; let me handle your tasks." [A seemingly fragile flower with an inner strength, Daughter of the Sea, crosses paths with an obsessed, dark, and sinister antagonist who contemplates disrupting the pond of bred fish every day.]

Before her rebirth, she was abandoned by her parents, then murdered by her seemingly pure but vile younger sister. After her rebirth, she kicked all her scum boyfriends to the curb and began a campaign of abuse against the superficially perfect. Rumors were rife on the internet that Qin Sheng was a kept woman? A bunch of computer nerds, "Let's hack the keyboard warriors' computers." The first director, "Boss, have you written the script yet?" The medical expert, "Sheng Sheng, our research institute will give you 100 million. When will you be able to join our team?" A famous painter, "Sister Sheng, take me along when you hold your art exhibition." The CEO of a billion-dollar company, "Boss, when are you going to publicly disclose your identity?" Finally, a big boss pulled Qin Sheng into his arms. "Sheng Sheng, I've transferred all the assets under my name to you." Netizens, "?? This world has suddenly become crazy?" She was a business genius, a computer genius, a legendary screenwriter, a legendary painter, and a legendary medical expert. It remained to be seen how she would create flourishing prosperity. (The male protagonist has a propensity for recognizing bitches, but is infinitely sweet and doting to the female protagonist!)

This book is finished! Please give my next book a try as your support helps me greatly! The book is called Abyssal Awakening! I'm captured? Fine, I can't help it since I can't move. Experimented on? At least give me some anaesthetic. I'm freed? Let me get some revenge. Want to plead for your life? Sorry, this miss here holds a grudge. I destroyed the lab so now let me explore this world freely. I somehow joined Mr Hero's party. Fine, he seems fun. "Aiya, how cruel. For the honour of being a hero you'd kill this missy huh?" She smiled whilst bleeding out. "Che, you still have the mind to joke right now?" He said with a glare. "What is life if not to enjoy every moment? Since I'm going to die and I can't avenge myself, I hope someone else does." "No one will. You were the only one who was more powerful than I with your Nanomancy. Now with you out of th-" "Hush child. I'm trying to die in peace here." "But I'm ol-!" "Ap! Good children don't disturb their elders." "But yo-!" "Bye~" She grinned before losing strength. "FUCK!" … Why am I sleeping in the snowfields? Mr Wolves are growling at me. Hungry huh?... Me too. This is my second book please have mercy on this author. Enjoy. Cover was drawn by the amazing Aoi Ogata Nanomancer=A mage that uses nanobots Discord Server: https://discord.gg/vrdTSkj8Va

The new novel "Rebirth Space: Charm of the '80s" has been released~ As the eldest daughter of the Yang Family's main branch, Yang Ruxin's pleasure was building the family fortune and supporting her younger siblings. But why was that blind and lame guy such a Relentless Spirit? When she cooked, he would come to light the fire; When she set up her stall, he would follow to hawk her goods... "I say, Mr. Gu, do you have to help with everything I do?" Yang Ruxin asked with a hint of annoyance. "Yes," Mr. Gu nodded earnestly. "Then right now I want to..." "Wife." Mr. Gu hurriedly stood up from his wheelchair, "as long as we don't part, I'll give you anything you want."