What are some of the most amusing funny hospital discharge stories you've heard?

A friend of mine matched with someone who said they were training their pet goldfish to do tricks. They even sent videos of the fish following a little stick around in the tank. It was so comical.

There was this one story where a person took Nyquil and then tried to cook. They ended up putting their keys in the oven instead of the food they were supposed to be baking. It was a total mess but very funny.

There was a story about a modern dance recital. A dancer was so into the music that he completely forgot the choreography and started making up his own wild moves. He was spinning around and waving his arms in the most absurd ways. But the funny part was that the other dancers on stage tried to incorporate his randomness into the performance, and it turned into a really unique and comical show.

A friend of mine told me that he matched with a guy on Grindr who said he was a professional chef. When they met up, the guy brought take - out food and tried to pass it off as his own cooking. It was so comical.

A funny sleepwalking story is about a girl. She sleepwalked to her closet, put on a bunch of her fanciest clothes, including a big hat and a long scarf. Then she walked around the house like she was at a fashion show. When she woke up, she couldn't figure out why all her dress - up clothes were out of the closet. It was really a comical scene. There are many times when sleepwalkers do things that are completely out of character and these actions make for some really funny stories.

A story I heard was about a new hire orientation. The HR was showing the new employees around the office. When they got to the break room, the HR accidentally tripped over a mop that was left out and went flying forward. All the new employees were trying hard not to laugh out loud. It was really funny.

I heard about a patient who tried to escape from the hospital by dressing up as a doctor. He stole a white coat and a stethoscope, but his slippers gave him away. He was running down the hall in his hospital slippers with a big 'Hospital Property' sign on them.

Well, I heard about a man who had his appendix out. When he woke up from anesthesia, he started speaking in a made - up language. He was so serious about it that the nurses thought he might have had some kind of brain issue at first. But it turned out he was just still half - asleep and making up nonsense. It was quite funny.

I heard a story where the groom thought he could fix his car all by himself before a big date with his now - wife. He ended up making it worse and had to call a tow truck. The best man recounted how the groom was sitting in the tow truck, looking all defeated, but it was so funny in hindsight. The groom's overconfidence in his car - fixing skills made for a great laugh.

I heard about a little boy who refused to use the toilet unless his teddy bear was sitting on the counter watching him. He said it was for moral support. Another kid would only use the toilet if he was wearing his superhero cape. He believed it gave him special powers to go potty.