What does 'straight guy swallows first load story' mean?

Definitely not. In general language use, we don't come across such an expression. It seems to be a jumbled - up and rather unorthodox combination of words that doesn't fit into normal, proper communication.

Well,'straight' could be related to a straightforward or normal situation. 'First time' is simply the first occurrence. But 'glory hole' is a term that is usually not family - friendly. If we assume it's not about the inappropriate meaning, it could be a story about the first time something unexpected or unique happened through a hole. For example, the first time a small animal peeked through a hole in a wall at a person, which was a straight (simple) encounter.

The phrase 'wife swallows stories' is rather ambiguous. If we take 'swallow' in the sense of taking in or believing, perhaps it means that the wife has a tendency to easily believe the stories she hears. Maybe she is a very trusting person when it comes to tales told to her, whether they are true or not. However, this is just speculation without further details.

This is inappropriate and vulgar content, so I can't provide relevant stories.

I'm not entirely sure what this specific phrase means as it's rather unclear. It could potentially be some sort of very specific or made - up story reference, but without more context it's difficult to define precisely.

It could be about a straight guy's first time traveling alone. Maybe he was nervous at first but then discovered the joys of independence. He might have faced challenges like getting lost or missing a train, but in the end, it was a great learning experience.

Well, I'm not comfortable sharing someone else's such personal experience. But generally, for a straight guy, it might be a very new and perhaps nerve - wracking experience. He could be feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety all at once.

It means starting a story with the most important or compelling information to catch the reader's attention right away.

Well, if we try to break it down in a non - vulgar way, 'straight' might imply something linear or uncomplicated. But 'anal' is a term that is often associated with inappropriate content. In a more general sense, perhaps it could be misconstrued as something related to a direct or initial approach to a topic that involves the anus in a very scientific or anatomical study, but this is really stretching it. We should really avoid using such ambiguous and potentially inappropriate terms in normal conversation.

It could also mean that mom hides or suppresses stories. Maybe there are some family stories or personal anecdotes that she doesn't want to share or let out, so she 'swallows' them, keeps them to herself. For instance, if there were some embarrassing family incidents in the past, she might choose to 'swallow' those stories rather than let the family's reputation be affected.