Can you share some short jokes and funny stories?

Sure. Here's one. A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store. Another one is, a man tells his doctor, 'Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home'.' The doctor says, 'That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.' 'Is it common?' asks the man. 'It's not unusual,' replies the doctor.

Sure. Here's one. A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store.

Sure. Here's a joke. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.

Joke: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything. Short story: A little boy was at the zoo with his mom. He saw a penguin and asked, 'Mom, what's that?' She replied, 'That's a penguin, son.' The boy said, 'It looks like it's wearing a tuxedo.'

Here's one. A priest was driving and got pulled over for speeding. The police officer asked, 'Father, were you in a rush?' The priest said, 'Sorry, son. I was daydreaming about my sermon.' The officer just laughed and let him go with a warning.

Another joke: Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit!

Here is a short story. A priest was walking by a construction site and saw a man working hard. The priest said, 'My son, you should take a break and remember God is watching over you.' The man replied, 'I'm the foreman. I don't need God to watch over me, I'm in charge here.' Later, a brick fell and almost hit the man. He quickly said, 'Father, I think I need God to watch over me after all!'

Joke: I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands. Story: A bear went to a bar and said, 'Give me a whiskey... and a cola.' The bartender said, 'Why the big pause?' The bear replied, 'I'm not sure; I was born with them.'

Joke: A priest was walking down the street one day when he noticed a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy was very small and the doorbell was too high for him to reach. After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the priest moved closer to the boy's position. He walked across the street, mounted the porch steps and pressed the bell for the boy. Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiled benevolently and asked, 'And now what, my little man?' The boy replied, 'Now we run!' Story: There was a very religious old lady who was known for her strict observance of the Sabbath. One Sabbath, she had to go to the market to buy some food for her sick neighbor. She felt very guilty but knew it was the right thing to do. As she walked through the market, she kept her head down. When she got home, she realized that God had blessed her efforts as she found an extra coin in her purse that she hadn't noticed before.

Joke: A retiree was asked why he always carried a spoon in his pocket. He said, 'Well, you never know when you might come across some free ice cream!'