Once upon a time, a little boy tried to sell his dog for $50. A man said, 'I'll give you $20 for it.' The boy declined. Later, the man said, 'I'll give you $40.' But the boy still said no. The man was confused and asked why. The boy replied, 'Because I don't want to sell my dog at all. I just wanted to see how much you thought he was worth!'
There was a cat that always followed the postman around the neighborhood. One day, the postman brought a small package for the cat's owner. The cat sat right in front of the door as if it was waiting for its special delivery. It was so cute and funny. The owner was amused by the cat's behavior every time the postman came.
Sure. Here's one. A little boy was at the zoo with his mother. They stopped in front of the elephant enclosure. The boy looked at the elephant and said, 'Mom, that elephant has really big feet.' His mother replied, 'Yes, dear, that's to support its big body.' Then the boy said, 'Mom, if that's true, then why do you wear high heels?'
Sure. Here is one. A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store. Another one. A duck went to a doctor and said, 'Doctor, I've got a bill stuck in my throat.' The doctor replied, 'Well, you should have been more careful when you were paying it!'
Joke: I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands. Story: A bear went to a bar and said, 'Give me a whiskey... and a cola.' The bartender said, 'Why the big pause?' The bear replied, 'I'm not sure; I was born with them.'
Once upon a time in the West, a young sheriff was very bad at shooting. One day, he had to face a bandit. He aimed his gun, closed his eyes and fired. When he opened his eyes, he saw the bandit's hat on the ground. The bandit was so shocked that he fainted. The sheriff was so proud that he picked up the hat and wore it, thinking he had shot it off the bandit's head. Everyone in town knew the truth but they all thought it was a really funny story.
There was a librarian who noticed a chicken wandering among the bookshelves. She chased it out but the next day it was back again. This time, she followed it and found that it led her to a small hole in the wall. Inside, there were a group of baby chicks huddled around some old, tattered books as if they were reading. It was the funniest and cleanest discovery she ever made in the library.
One story could be about a clumsy elf named Tinsel. Tinsel was always getting into little mishaps in Santa's workshop. One Christmas Eve, he accidentally knocked over the paint for the toy trains. Instead of panicking, he used his creative side and painted the trains in all sorts of wacky patterns. When Santa saw them, he laughed and decided to deliver those special trains to the children who loved unique things. The kids were delighted to receive such one - of - a - kind toys.
Sure. A bear walks into a bar and says, 'Give me a whiskey... and a cola.' The bartender asks, 'Why the big pause?' The bear says, 'I don't know. I was born with them.' This simple joke plays on the double meaning of 'pause' and 'paws'.
There was a cat that always followed its owner everywhere. One day, the owner decided to take a bath. The cat was very curious and sat outside the bathroom door meowing. When the owner opened the door after the bath, the cat looked at the owner in a very strange way as if it didn't recognize the clean and wet human in front of it. It was really a funny moment.
Sure. Here's a clean joke: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything. As for a funny story, once there was a little boy who thought his nose was too big. So he decided to pull it every day to make it smaller. After a week, his nose was still big but his arms were really long.