What are some good funny short joke stories for kids?

There's a story of a duck that walked into a bar and asked, 'Got any grapes?' The bartender said no. The next day, the duck came back and asked, 'Got any grapes?' The bartender, a bit annoyed, said no. This went on for a few days. Finally, the bartender yelled, 'If you come in here one more time and ask for grapes, I'll nail your beak to the bar!' The next day, the duck came in and asked, 'Got any nails?' The bartender said no. So the duck said, 'Good, got any grapes?' This is a simple and funny story that kids can easily understand and enjoy.

Another one is that a little boy asked his father, 'Dad, do soldiers in the army wear bulletproof vests all the time?' His father replied, 'Yes, they do.' The boy then asked, 'Then why are there still so many dead soldiers?' His father was stumped. The boy said, 'Shouldn't they wear dead - proof vests instead?' This joke shows a child's innocent and creative thinking.

A kid at the Thanksgiving table asks, 'Why does the turkey have such a big fan (its tail feathers)?' His dad answers, 'Because it doesn't want to get too hot while it's cooking in the oven!'

Well, here is a different one. I'm reading a book about anti - gravity. It's impossible to put down. The humor comes from the double meaning of 'put down' which can mean both to stop reading a book and to place something down physically.

Well, here is a good one. A snail got mugged by two turtles. When the police asked him what happened, he said, 'I don't know. It all happened so fast.'

There's a joke that goes like this: A man tells his doctor, 'Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'' The doctor replies, 'That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.' 'Is it common?' asks the man. The doctor says, 'It's not unusual.' Another short joke is, what's brown and sticky? A stick.

One more. A man tells his doctor, 'Doc, help me. I'm addicted to Twitter!' The doctor replies, 'Sorry, I don't follow you.' This joke short story combines the modern concept of Twitter and the play on words with 'follow'.

Here's one. Little Johnny was in class and the teacher said, 'Whoever answers my next question can go home.' Suddenly, a pen fell on the floor. Little Johnny shouted, 'Oh, pick that up!' The teacher said, 'Who said that?' Little Johnny replied, 'Me, and now can I go home?' Another is a baby snake asked his mother, 'Mom, are we poisonous?' His mother said, 'Yes, son.' The baby snake said, 'I just bit my tongue!'

A young bird was afraid to fly. All its siblings had already taken their first flight. One day, it saw a delicious worm on a branch far away. The hunger made it forget its fear and it took off. It flew beautifully and got the worm. It's a funny and inspiring story for kids as it shows that sometimes we can overcome our fears when we have a strong motivation.

The story of 'The Gingerbread Man' is really funny for kids. The Gingerbread Man runs away from everyone who wants to eat him, chanting 'Run, run, as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!' Another good one is 'Silly Sally'. It has all sorts of silly things happening as Sally goes for a walk upside down. There's also 'The Enormous Turnip' where all the characters have to work together to pull out the huge turnip, and the process is full of comical moments.