What funny jokes do you have on your phone?

I was a genius in the Earthen Plane. I was a cripple in the Spiritual Plane. I was dead in the Cloud Plane. After experiencing death in the form of dragon sneeze, I find myself back in my room in Earthen Plane where I was a genius. I had been too focused on training myself in the past life. Now that I've been given a second chance, I should just enjoy my life to the fullest extent! Instead of locking myself up in my room to cultivate, take in a few disciples so they can help take care of me! Easy life is best life! The other Planes suck anyway, I'll just lay back here and relax! All I need to do is to teach my dear disciples on the things I've learnt while they take care of me! Huh? What do you mean one of my disciples destroyed the Sinister Demon Sect last night? Do you not see how she's here massaging my shoulders now? There's no way my disciple could have obliterated the all-powerful Xi Family, can't you see she's obediently pouring tea for me over there? You must be delusional to even suggest my disciple could have flattened the impassable Death Mountains, just look at how cute she is taking a nap under the cherry blossom tree. What do you mean my cute disciples are Yanderes? *** Notes: Side Stories in "My Cute (Yandere) Disciples' Side Stories" If you're here for the R18 tag expecting adult scenes, know that this was a decision I made quite late into writing this so the scenes only come up very late into the story. One or more of the disciples may or may not have a tragic (depending on personal opinions) backstory that may or may not offend/disturb some readers (depending on your personal opinions/mental fortitude/openmindedness/morality/sexual orientation/real world knowledge/political agendas/reaction if someone gave you lemons/view on whether the Earth is flat or round, which I personally think it's neither and is actually a donut nom nom nom) which may or may not affect the rest of the story significantly. Consider yourself sufficiently warned. Story inspired from "My female disciples are scary" by feeling_tired Cover is done by the really awesome Lumi! Buy me tea (because I prefer tea over coffee): https://ko-fi.com/draekai You can join our discord through this link: https://discord.gg/CRrb56c

In the most cliched fashion, a giant truck-kun smashed into my World, killing everyone with it. And in the next most cliched event, I was given a second chance in life by the gods to live another life in a world of swords, magic and dragons! It’s literally a dream come true! Be a hero? Who has the time?! Conquer the world? Like hell I’ll do something so troublesome! Diving into dungeons, exploring ancient ruins and meeting all the weirdos of the world? Sign me right up!! I’m only interested in travelling the world to find the most interesting materials I can use to write the best story I can! I’ll show you my creativity and dazzle this new world with the stories I’ll write! I’ll fight with dragons, swim with krakens, wrestle giants, eat all the cakes and bed the beauties! Time to live this life however I want! Eh? A psycho is running around the world saying that they are the hero who will slay the demon lord? Why is there such a crazy person? There’s someone out there threatening the world with nukes? How did they even find out how to make those? Some crazy hobo is going into other people’s houses to smash pots to look for money? That guy really must be crazy. What Do You Mean There Are Other Transmigrators In My Harem Fantasy? ----- [Character Creation:] [Gender:] [Male] [Female] >[Futa] *** Notes: Any R-rated scenes will be denoted by a '*' followed by an 'R' with the number of 'R's showing how much of it is R-rated. '*R' would be around 25%, '*RR' would be about 50% and '*RRR' would most likely be the entire chapter. You can join our discord through this link: https://discord.gg/CRrb56c

What would you do if you were Severus Snape in his time at Hogwarts? Benedict Clarke, an actor who played the young Severus Snape in one of the last sagas of the Harry Potter films, now finds himself in the body of 16-year-old Severus Snape and begins to live like one in the world of Harry Potter. Time plays a trick on his life and his knowledge of the future confuses him even more. The future, the past and the present get mixed up. What does Hermione Granger have to do with all this? A FF in which you will have romance, action, drama, magic and two people who do not belong to the magical world of Britain in 1976, but still go ahead and seek to live their lives and improve the lives of others in their way to end the Dark Lord who threatens the lives of all. Each chapter will be between 2000 and 3000 words. There is no system! This is a Fanfic that only focuses on the canonical world of Harry Potter, all the previous past of Severus and the other characters in the story is canonical, it will only vary and change once Severus starts to change and use his new knowledge. Severus/Benedict, will have a great intellect, talent and creativity for magic as described in the canon, all this added to his new knowledge, he will be a powerful wizard, but it will take quite some time to be as powerful as Voldemort or other wizards of that caliber. Severus/Benedict, the protagonist of this article, knows the world of Harry Potter, but he is in a decade of which he does not have much information, so he will try to use his knowledge about the possible future of this world to advance in life. As I said, there is not much canonical information about the 1970s in HP, so to make Severus have a past as canonical as possible I used all the canonical information about the 1970s and only added information to the blanks left by the canon, so the plot of Severus' past would be as canonical as possible, it may change a little bit due to my intervention in the blanks, but in short, the general trend of Severus' past does not change and the small trend may change. The pairing for the end of this story is already decided, but before being with this person Severus will go through many situations and relationships, so you can vote the pairings that Severus will have before reaching the right person, if you want to give ideas, you are more than welcome to share them. Disclaimer: The original images do not belong to me, as does the content of the Harry Potter characters, books or movies. All belong to their respective creators and owners. I stated that I do not own the rights to anything other than the FF idea.

This is my book and English is my third language so expect some sentence, grammar and spelling error. A headstart for everyone, the MC may have absorbed Aizen and Dr. Gero's soul but that doesn't mean he will become like them. I am creating a character that is different to them so please excuse me is I offended some people. [Synopsis] A man was transported in a dark place where ball of light lights appear and disappear from time to time. He approached one and devour one ball accidentally. He discovered that it is also a soul and he obtain all of its knowledge. He is in glee and starts devouring everything in his vission. Who would have though that a devil was watching him with interest. Disclaimers: The Picture I used in the cover is not mine. I found in google and all of the credits for the cover is all to him/her. I also don't own the anime characters in this book. They belong to their respected creators, only the originals I created was mine. Thank you for reading this before opening my book. Have a nice day guys!

"""Five years ago, in order to raise money for her scumbag boyfriend, Qiao Zhen endured humiliation and agreed to be a surrogate. However, just as she was about to give birth, she encountered the scumbag and her stepsister getting together. Scumbag: ""Zhen Zhen, although I love her, I love you too. Can the three of us live together?"" Step sister: ""Your body is already dirty, and you still want him to marry you? Dream on!"" Qiao Zhen left resolutely, suffering from the pains of childbirth. When she woke up again, she was thrown overseas to fend for herself. Five years later, Qiao Zhen was reborn and returned with the five-year-old princess, Nuo Nuo. She wanted to take back everything that belonged to her, but unexpectedly met a bright little ball in the company. The little packrat had been beaten to a pulp by Nuo Nuo because he catcalled, and was threatened by Nuo Nuo viciously. ""Just you wait! One day, I'll make you call me brother!"" Hence, everyone saw the lawless Young Master Gong transform into Qiao Zhen's human form. The client was making things difficult for him? Little Master sneered. ""How dare you bully my sister's mommy? You'll go bankrupt tomorrow!"" A scumbag trying to salvage the situation? Little Master ordered someone to give him a good beating. ""You think you're worthy of my sister's mommy? Take your lover and get lost!"" Qiao Zhen was pampered all the way until one day, the little princess nodded. “You can be my brother now.” ""That's great!"" The young master pulled the handsome Gong Corporation's CEO over and said seriously, ""In that case, your Mommy is my Mommy, and your Daddy is my Daddy!"" Qiao Zhen :""…"" After they got married, Qiao Zhen couldn't help asking the man when she saw how similar the two little dumplings looked. “Do you think they… could be twins?” “I can't tell.” The man loomed over her, his grip fierce, knocking her back. “Unless you have another pair. Let me compare them.”"

Alex was living his life normally, until one day a screen appeared in front of him. The protagonist will be OP, if you don't like it, don't even read it. Story translated with Google Translate